We live in a society that is destroyed with a dominating lust beyond belief. Every place you turn has some form of sexual innuendo, models half clothed, skimpier bathing suits, and don't forget social media. Social media and the way technology has evolved has revolutionized the way the devil can operate in our lives. So many people struggle with pornagraphy, sexual addictions, or just a ridiculous amount of lust for everything that walks by. So as a Christian I have been told repeatedly to not look at pornagraphy or to not have sex before marriage because it is the right thing to do in God's eyes. 1 Corinthians 6:18 says that we are to flee from sexual immorality because our bodies are a temple of God. 1 Corinthians 7:1-40 simply paraphrased states that sex is a good thing, but that it is designed for husband and wife. Along with that Hebrews 13:4 says 4 Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous."
I am looking at these verses in a mindset of a very imperfect person who has sinned and is going through this world fighting the good right against what the world brings. In my mind I'm thinking "Oh no, I blew it. I lost my virginity, I have looked at pornagraphy, I'm sleeping with my girlfriend. I have basically defied everything that I know is right just to please my lust for pleasure. "
Fast forward from where I was with all of those struggles to where I am now. I am happily married 2 1/2 years to my stunning wife Kendra and she has dealt with these same issues as me before we met. So we met as two unpure imperfect people, we knew eachothers past, we didn't judge eachother. We dated, we made mistakes along the way, got engaged, still made mistakes. So you're thinking, "Well we are going to be married so why wait?" It's just something that lust whispers to you. The world says to move in together because it's better to test it out first to see how things work out. But why is this such a HUGE issue other than just the sin in it? Ill tell you, living together is a false representation of what marriage really is.
When you are not married, your levels of lust are astronomical for the person you are with. Once you give into that, the devil has a hay day with your relationship. The day you get married, the devil takes away that lust and desire for that pleasure. That feeling of want for your spouse suddenly disappears then you're left with a ability to freely enjoy the sex God gave you, but its empty because it's not in lust. Sex was designed for marriages to share love for one another. It's a gift and a necessity in marriage to heal pain, to comfort, to uplift, to show love. I have grown up my whole life being told what not to do. I was told that it's bad and it will cause problems in the future, but never was I told the effects it has on your marriage if you were unpure before marriage. Kendra and I experienced a lot of issues that we have never heard talked about before. So we decided to share our story with you because the enemy will operate in every way you expect it. If there's a clear path to good, then there will undoubtedly be a very tempting path to the bad. Marriage is a sacred God given relationship that requires an endless amount of love and intimacy to be successful. So make sure you go into marriage with a realistic expectation of what will happen in your marriage bed if you have been unpure before marriage.
In my marriage, we got through it because we focused on what God's word says and learned what sex was designed for. Creating children and intimacy between man and wife.
