I Refuse To Stay Silent About My Bullies

I Refuse To Stay Silent About My Bullies

I could remember every time she told me "No one likes you. You're annoying."
561
views

It was a Saturday morning. The weather was chilly but beautiful. I walked into Kroger to get some orange juice and eggs. Of course, I also got something that was not on my list. What would a trip to the grocery store be if you didn't do that?

I made my way to self-checkout. I swept my items quickly, paid, and started to walk outside. There's a catch though. As I walked away from the self-checkout, I saw her. I saw my old bully. I saw the bully who spoke to me with harsh and hurtful words. I saw the bully who belittled me. I saw the bully who made never want to talk in class. I saw the bully who has hurt me still to this day.

When I saw her, my body froze. When I saw her, I had flashbacks to that art class. When I saw her, my body had the reaction of crying. I'm usually not a crier, so I knew this pain was real. When I saw my bully, I could smell the room we sat in. This bully had words that were laced together perfectly solely to hurt me.

I never thought I would have to see her ever again, but I was wrong. There she was, standing right in front of me. I'm still not sure if she remembered who I was. I remembered her though. The moment I saw her, I heard it. I heard her jokes about me and her horrible words.

When I saw this bully, I realized how much she truly hurt me. Her words were suppressed into my brain. I could remember each and every time she decided to belittle me and make me feel worthless. I could remember every time she told me "No one likes you. You're annoying." It rang louder than the fire alarm in a quiet hallway.

As my body began to unfreeze, I quickly said "I'm sorry!! Excuse me!!" and sprinted out to my car. I sat there in tears. Truly bawling like no other. Why? Why did I have to see her? Why? Her face was bright and clear in my head, and her words were nonstop in my mind. I don't want to remember this stuff. I don't want to remember how she made me feel. I don't want to remember the sound of her voice, but I do.

You see, that is how it is sometimes. In fact, that is how it is a lot of the time. You can see or hear the smallest thing, and your mind is overcome with terrible memories. Bullies intend to hurt you. They intend to make your life miserable. While she didn't make my life miserable, she did inflict pain upon me.

Even though I know her words do not define who I am, it still cuts deep.

It has still done damage. I refuse to let her or any of my bullies win. Seeing her again left a beating pain in my chest, stopped my breathing for a second, and caused me to cry for a while. I didn't want to think about it, but I couldn't shake it from my head all day.

Seeing one of my bullies in Kroger that morning, was a reminder of how much people do not care. It was a reminder of how staying quiet does nothing but cause more pain. So, I'm done staying quiet. I will write about my bullies. Not for attention, but to let people know bullying can happen to anyone and everyone. I'm done staying quiet. Bullying cut me deep, and even though I won't say their names- I will not keep the words to myself anymore.


To anyone being bullied or who has been bullied,

Please know it is okay to talk about it. You are not alone.

Cover Image Credit: Encounter Campus Ministry

Popular Right Now

The 17 Best Unpopular Opinions From The Minds Of Millennials

Yes, dogs should be allowed in more places and kids in less.
97114
views

There are those opinions that are almost fact because everyone agrees with them. Waking up early is horrible. Music is life. Sleep is wonderful. These are all facts of life.

But then there are those opinions that hardly anyone agrees with. These ones -- from Twitter, Pinterest and Reddit -- are those types of opinions that are better left unsaid. Some of these are funny. Some are thought-provoking. All of them are the 17 best unpopular opinions around.

1. My favorite pizza is Hawaiian pizza.

2. Binge watching television is not fun and actually difficult to do.

3. I love puns... Dad jokes FTW.

4. Milk in the cup first... THEN the bloody tea.

5. I wish dogs were allowed more places and kids were allowed fewer places.

6. "Space Jam" was a sh*t movie.

7. Saying "money cannot buy happiness" is just wrong.

8. People keep saying light is the most important thing in photographing. I honestly think the camera is more important.

9. Bacon is extremely overrated.

10. Literally, anything is better than going to the gym.

11. Alternative pets are for weird people.

12. Google doodles are annoying.

13. It is okay to not have an opinion on something.

14. It's weird when grown adults are obsessed with Disney.

15. This is how to eat a Kit Kat bar.

16. Mind your own business.

17. There is such a thing as an ugly baby.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

I Won't Forgive The Anti-Semitic Students Of Spain Park, Not Yet

Maybe it isn't time for an apology.

226
views

I am Jewish. It is something I have never been afraid of and something I value as much in life as I do with my family and friends. Throughout my life, though I have witnessed hate of the Jewish people and jokes made about Jewish people.

In high school, I had to listen to jokes about Jews and the gas chambers and was asked because I was Jewish if I could do someone else's math homework.

To say I had to deal with anti-Semitism in the South does not come close to describing what I had to go through. As time went by the jokes stopped and I thought I would not have to deal with instances of prejudice or bigotry but I was wrong. Growing up as one of the only Jewish people in my friend group and in high school it made me consider myself strong and ready for college but in my freshman year I had to go through other jokes about my religion and even in sophomore year had to witness someone I thought was my friend make a joke about my religion because "he thought it was funny."

I let the instances of anti-Semitism serve as times when I could prove people wrong I learned to forgive and forget.

But I had to witness other acts of hate towards Judaism while in college. From swastikas on a fraternity house, a synagogue shooting, the BDS movement and more hate speech, the hate towards Jews have seemed to grow and I do not understand why. I get hurt each time I hear of an instance but it has not allowed me to view my Judaism any differently. However, there was an occurrence that has affected me in a different way.

It happened in my home state and it has not sat well with me.

On Monday a video surfaced of multiple high school students making anti-Semitic and anti-Black comments. The video featured a guy turning around the camera multiple times to show he was laughing and thought it was funny while others made comments about concentration camps, what would happen if Jews ruled the world and asking what the world would be like without the Holocaust. The students were from Spain Park in Birmingham and have gathered quite a reputation online.

To say I am filled with anger, disappointment, and embarrassment is an understatement.

This is my home state and these students are not only disrespecting the Jewish and Black people in the state of Alabama but throughout the US and possibly even in the world. I am hurt by this instance but I am not ready to forgive these students just yet.

After the video was leaked online some of the students sent messages to the person who uploaded the video apologizing. That I took as a mature gesture until I read the apology from the girl in the video. The apology asked if the user could remove the video because it would ruin her life and reputation. It was later found out that the female student is the daughter of the manager of the Toyota dealership in Hoover after the manager posted an apology.

Any remorse I had going for these students was now gone.

They were not sorry. They were sorry that they got caught and were facing consequences. They gave the apology that your parents made you say when you did not want to apologize. They did not care about who they had harmed or what they had said, they cared because they had to face consequences and they know that this mistake would follow them for the rest of their life.

I'm at a loss for words.

I don't know how to feel. I know someone will tell me I am overreacting but how am I supposed to approach this? What they said was wrong and there is no proper way to express frustration for it. I know people get offended by certain things but some things are not meant to be a joke. So I hope what you said was worth it and was fun to say because it will follow you for the rest of your life. Some lessons are best-learned overtime and it looks like you will have a chance to reflect on these events.

Related Content

Facebook Comments