One of my new year's resolutions was to start
a blog. I hold my journal close to my heart and
when my emotions over-take me I always find
that writing is my safe-haven. I have battled
with myself about what I should keep in my
journal and what I should put out in the open,
but after a scary incident I realize that this story
is worth sharing.
The headline says what birth control does to you.
You probably figured out I was on birth control.
Shocker, right? Seriously though, what eighteen
year old girl isn't on birth control? As I write this
I hope that my family still loves me and thinks of
me as their sweet first baby (I totally still am, by
the way.) This was me being proactive. Birth
control is suppose to regulate your period and
of course if you have sex protect you from getting
pregnant. I am not old enough to have a baby,
I have a baby sister and that is enough. I just wanted
to make sure I was safe in case something happened.
Listen, if you're on birth control
read this. Read the article like I
usually do, skip that super interesting
stuff above and read the headlines.
This is important.
It was life-threatening for me.
I knew my body wasn't
reacting to this stuff well.
It made me emotional.
Before birth control I never cried. I thought girls
that cried all the time were weak. I am not weak,
I am a strong girl and I take pride in that. I hate
admitting it, but two weeks of taking birth control
and every little thing bothered me. (In retrospect,
I should probably apologize to my super sweet
boyfriend for all the times I took out some anger
on him.)
My period got a lot worse.
Please for the love. If you don't want to know,
don't read. My period was irregular before
which is another reason I got on birth control,
but I never got cramps and it was always pretty
light. When I got on birth control, I had to start
taking midol. The stomach cramps were horrible.
I felt so bad, and my period was so much heavier.
I passed out in the shower.
I had never passed out. I was healthy. I workout
three times a week. I eat good. I actually lost
weight when I moved to college. I may not be
at my goal weight right now, but I am healthy.
I woke up one morning and got in the shower.
I got really dizzy, I knew something was wrong,
I stepped out of the shower and as soon as I did
I blacked out. I have no idea how long I was out,
but luckily I reached for my phone to call my best
friend and she came to my rescue. I was okay,
but that was not normal for me. I went to my
family physician who is awesome and she said
it was probably just anxiety and temperature
change from the shower, it sounded good to me.
I went with it, but looking back, that might have
been a red flag.
What Happened Next?
Thursday
I woke up and my back and abdomen was sore.
I thought it was from the killer Zumba class I took
Tuesday night. I did some stretches and it felt okay.
I walked to class and noticed some chest pain, but
I was late (like always) walking really fast up a big
hill for class that started in five minutes in 30 degree
weather. I just thought it was cold outside. I walked
to my other classes and noticed shortness of breath.
I got back to my dorm and thirty minutes later I still
had shortness of breath and noticed my heart rate
was up. I called my mom and my sister and decided
to go to my doctor in the morning. It got worse though,
I finally decided I should leave JSU and drive home so
I wasn't alone. I know my body and I did not feel normal.
I felt like I couldn't breath and I was scared. I drove
halfway home and then called my best friend to ask if
she would take me home from our work (where she was).
I was ugly crying. I was so scared. My pain was getting
worse. She took me home and decided to spend the
night. My little sister, my best friend, and I all slept in
the same bed. I don't think any of us actually slept
though. Every way I tossed and turned it hurt so bad.
I was so tired and I just wanted to rest.
Friday
Finally, at 5:03 am I had to go wake up my mom.
I couldn't wait to go to the doctor at 8. She knew
when I woke her up we had to go to the ER. I
couldn't take a deep breathe, I was in so much
pain, and I was so so so scared. We got in the
car and she called 911. I was okay we made it
to the hospital (which is like a 35 minute drive)
in 20 minutes. Then we pulled in and I got dizzy.
I got so dizzy. I was yelling "Mama, there's
something wrong!' My vision went and then my
hearing went. I passed out. I was blacked out
for 15 seconds, but my mom said it felt like
15 hours. Finally we got to the ER. When I
explained my symptoms, they said they
were going to rule out a collapsed lung and
blood clots in my lungs. They were just
ruling it out. I had an X-Ray and then they
wanted me to have a CT scan with contrast.
Shoutout to my ER doctor for staying and
making sure I was okay three hours after his
shift. My CT scan came back and I had several
blood clots in my lungs (also called a pulmonary
embolism) Y'all I am healthy and I am active and
I am eighteen years old. This is not something
that just happens. This is something that kills
people. If I didn't go to the ER, it would have
been fatal. They ran so many test. I was kept
in the hospital for three days. Like I said, I am
a strong girl, but this was the most pain I have
ever been in and it was scary.
What Exactly Is A Pulmonary Embolism?
When you take a birth control with estrogen it
makes you four times more likely to form a clot.
Since I tend to either have really good luck or
really bad luck, I formed one in my lungs. I guess
it was my turn for some bad luck. This made it
really hard to breathe. It felt like someone took
my chest and was squeezing it as hard as they
could. Arteries in my lungs were blocked by this
clot, causing it to feel like I couldn't breath.
I thought I was dying. I have to have check up's
with a hematologist (blood doctor) and a
pulmonologist (lung doctor.) Hopefully, three
months from now it will be like it never happened,
but once you have a blood clot you are more
prone to have one again. There are so many risks
to look into. I never knew I would have something
happen so life threatening from taking birth control.
Recovery
It's been a week. I have to take blood thinners for at
least three months. I have been at my weakest point
I have ever been at. Honestly, it has been miserable.
I get tired easy, my resting heart rate is in the high
90's (it's usually low 60's or high 50's.) I get worn
out from walking up the stairs. I have to tell myself
to breath and when I do I have anxiety that I won't
be able too. I am okay though, but this is something
I never knew could happen.
This is something worth sharing.
My Support System
I am so thankful through all of this for so many
people. When something like this happen you
see how loved you are. My mom never left the
hospital except to go get me a bag. My dad
was so supportive and came everyday with
anything I asked for. My best friend that took
me home and spent the night, came and saw
me everyday even if it was after her shift that
got over at 10 pm. My boyfriend literally turned
around from going to school to come see me
and stayed for 13 hours straight at the hospital
and watched me cry and still called me pretty.
My Bapa, a super important businessman,
came and saw me on Saturday before work
because he had to make sure "the important stuff"
was okay before he headed to work. The list goes
on and on. So many people came and saw me
and checked on me and I am so thankful. My
friends and family make things like this so
much easier and I couldn't do it without them.
