1. The lifeguard, is not the babysitter.

When a lifeguard who is trained to visually scan a pool and respond to swimmers in distress has 40 people in their zone or section, it's hard to be watching 10 small children's every move, just because they don't have guardian or adult anywhere near them.

If your kids are older and great swimmers, depending on the facilities policies, sure, be my guest, and read that new 50 Shades book in your sun hat under an umbrella. However, if your kids are in lifejackets, or even better, aren't in lifejackets, but still cannot swim independently, you should, by all means, be in the water with your kid.

Yes, we are there to ensure their safety and will respond to any emergency, but we aren't only watching your kids, and certainly can't attend to the behavioral issues and other concerns of your kids, at all times.

2. There is a reason your 3 year old in a life jacket can't go in the deep end

Yep, you heard us right through our megaphones.

Your toddler or even your 10 year old for that matter, wearing a lifejacket, cannot come in the deep end. Obviously, this varies by facility, but at many places, the aquatic staff does not want to encourage non-swimmers to swim in a section of the pool designed for experienced swimmers. Imagine if you let your kid go into the deep end of a pool at home, with other kids not wearing lifejackets, and they decide "I'll be fine" and take off the lifejacket.

Or, if your child gets hit with a giant wave from the older kids cannonball, and rolls onto their stomach and the lifejacket is too heavy for them to flip around? Would you be willing to let them swim in the deepest part of the pool without a floatation device? If the answer is no, they should not be going in the deep end, period. The deep end doesn't end well for kids in lifejackets.

Moral of the story, once your kid learns to swim on their own, they may come into the deep end. Until then, at my facility, you have two options, you can hold onto them and practice their swimming in the deep end without a lifejacket, or keep them in the shallow end.

3. Under 48 inches is, well, under 48 inches

We measure kids upon entry of our facilities. The slide manufacturers set the height requirements, not the facility. It doesn't really matter if you "swear my kid measured 49'' at their last doctor'q245s appointment" or they're "only two inches too short", 48 inches is 48 inches. No need to argue with those just trying to do their jobs, and we often have options for kids under the height requirements of the bigger slides.

4. No, you can't ride the slides with your kid who is 38 inches tall

Kid didn't quite make the 48" mark when you came into the park? Sorry, but that doesn't mean your kid can ride the large slides with a solid 48" requirement, with you...

...if that were the case, someone probably would have mentioned that option. Don't try to sneak around the rules or fool the slide operators, a rule is a rule and they are there for you and your child's safety.

5. The lifeguard doesn't hate your kid, they just REALLY want them to stop running

The job of a lifeguard is to keep the patrons within an aquatic facility safe, in and out of the water. Running should never be allowed at outdoor or indoor pool facilities, with tile or with concrete, to prevent slipping, scrapes, concussions, and tons of other injuries and dangers. Explain this to your children before spending the day at the pool, and it will save the lifeguards from having to blow their whistles and yell through their megaphones at your kid, repeatedly.

6. Yeah, floaties and baby boats? That's a no from me. 

5 words: United States Coast Guard Approved.

If the toy or floatation device your packing in your pool bag doesn't have a US Coast Guard approved label, then pools should be turning them away. Arm floats commonly known as water wings, are not only frowned upon by the CDC, but they are also not Coast Guard approved, unless the arm rings are connected to the chest, providing support in the front and back.

Puddle Jumpers, for example, is a brand that makes these types of unconventional lifejackets that are approved by the Coast Guard. As far as pool noodles, baby boats, and inflatable pool rings go, these aren't acceptable forms of life preservation devices, and should never be the only preventative measure present from drowning. Stick to the Coast Guard approved lifejackets, it could save your kids life.