It’s my party and I will cry if I want to — what a statement to associate with a birthday, am I right?

But we love to use it. We love to be a little angsty. We love to make our stress and bad days public, almost like a birthday party, except maybe a little more like a pity party.

I am no exception.

I am not going to lie and say when I am having a bad day I keep it to myself, because to be honest, you can probably hear me complaining as you are reading this article. And I am not at all saying that you should hold in your emotions, that is bad and every emotion deserves feeling.

But what I realized this week (while sitting in my car waiting to go into work because I did not want to be too eager for my shift) is that sometimes I love having bad days. Well, okay, maybe not love, but I am very well acquainted with them. Sometimes I even take them on coffee dates or bring them out during quick encounters throughout the day. Sometimes I think what went wrong with my day today?

My question for myself is why?

Honestly I could only think of one answer. At times I think having a bad day is almost a way to get attention or, like a new shirt, I am just waiting for someone to ask me about it. It is like I am making the invites to my birthday party and deciding the guest list, except it is a little more of my pity party and I will hand them out to anyone and everyone in site.

But in the words of a good pal, “Pity parties are not real parties because we like to play and have fun”.

And she is right. Pity parties are not real parties. Pity parties are not an “Apples to Apples” or Fishbowl type of game night. Instead, they are the kind of party where you ordered a silly clown but instead got one straight out of any horror movie that I have never seen.

They take down our confidence in a way that we feel must be built up by others sympathizing with us. So while sitting in my car after thinking to myself, “what went wrong today?”, I just let out a slight silent scream saying, “HEY YOU, YEAH YOU OVER THERE WITH THE SAD SLUMP, WHY DO YOU NOT ASK YOURSELF ‘WHAT WENT RIGHT TODAY?’”

And with that silent “check myself” moment, I did just that.

I realized I had seen one of my friends that I had not seen in a while. I realized that I actually understood the subjunctive in Spanish. I realized that even though I did not get to do my speech on Goat Yoga, I am getting to write it on Helen Keller (I love Helen, this is another topic for another article though).

Life was not as bad as I was presenting it with my distressed face, slumped shoulders, and constant moaning/whining.

So whenever you feel the need to create a Facebook group for your bad days I have some thoughts for you

1. honestly get a finsta, this is a safe place for complaints.

2. ask yourself WHAT IS GOING RIGHT!?

3. remember that you are in a world where the creator of the universe said, “oh yeah they are going to be great in this specific life”, and has a freaking plan for you

(and bad days are a part of it for a reason, so by the transitive property they are good days if they lead to the Lord -— can I get an AMEN?!)

*Final disclosure - I am NOT telling you not to feel sad, stressed, upset, frazzled because I do all the time, I just want to remind how to exhale a little in those times.*