Let’s face it, we’ve all been there. You just got back from a jungle expedition in Asia, and you decided on bringing back a different kind of souvenir this time. You decided to break several international laws and sneak a wild tiger back with you to keep him as your beloved pet. Things are going great at first and your new tiger is wonderfully behaved, until suddenly everything changes. Your sweet, cuddly pet suddenly goes berserk and starts eating all the neighborhood dogs. When you reach this point with your pet tiger, here are five things that always happen, time and time again.

1. Your neighbors will start asking questions.

At first, your neighbors may not notice that their dogs are missing, but before long they will turn up on your doorstep asking if you have seen anything. You will say no, but from this moment on the neighbors will watch you like a hawk, so you have to be careful when taking your tiger for a walk during early mornings. Or if they see the tiger roaming around the neighborhood, they may put two and two together since you just got back from Asia. They just might march up to your door and demand to know if the tiger belongs to you, and then you have a real problem on your hands.

2. You will save money on tiger food.

Everyone knows that tiger food gets expensive, especially during peak season when all sorts of people are illegally sneaking tigers into the country. Those greedy pet stores take full advantage of this and as a result, they raise tiger food prices to immense proportions. Luckily, your pet tiger will likely be full from all the neighborhood dogs that it will have been eating lately, so it will require a lot less tiger food. This is one of the biggest advantages of the fact that your snuggly pet tiger has recently turned into a violent brute, thus endangering the lives of all the dogs in your neighborhood.

3. People will tell you that you should have gotten a more traditional pet.

At this point your judgmental parents, friends or maybe even significant other will undoubtedly make some sort of rude comment about how you should have gotten a traditional pet instead of a tiger, like maybe a rabbit or cat. These people will likely say you would have been better off with a pet that would not eat all the dogs in your neighborhood, but you should not pay attention to any of this. The bond between you and your wonderful jungle cat is stronger than any bond you could possibly have had with a normal cat, so if it takes a few neighborhood dogs to make your jungle friend happy, so be it.

4. There will be a lot less dogs in your neighborhood.

Sure, some neighbors will not be happy that your tiger is eating their dogs, but other, less dog-friendly, neighbors will undoubtedly be overjoyed, and they may even send you a gift basket as appreciation for all the great work your tiger is doing in improving the neighborhood. Old Mr. Jenkins swore revenge on the Jones’s poodle when the poodle did something naughty on Mr. Jenkins’ lawn, and now your tiger has given Mr. Jenkins the revenge he so deeply desired.

5. You will have to find a clever way to sneak your tiger friend back into Asia before the two of you are caught by the authorities.

Eventually, some neighbor will report you and your tiger to the authorities, for the sole reason that your tiger ate the neighbor’s sweet little dog. The authorities will then come for the tiger, which will catapult you on a quest similar to the plot of many '80s movies where the main character (you) has to find a way to sneak your misunderstood non-human friend (the tiger) back to where he came from before the evil men in suits get their hands on him and perform evil, inhumane experiments on him. The evil men in suits have begged and pleaded with you, saying things like “we aren’t going to hurt him” followed by the classic “we just want to put him in the local zoo, where he belongs.” But you know this is all part of their diabolical plan to destroy your precious tiger, who happens to have now eaten every single dog in your neighborhood. You must find a way to get him back to his homeland, no matter the cost.

Every time someone illegally sneaks a tiger into the country who then starts eating all the dogs he can find, these things happen without fail. So next time you find yourself with a pet tiger and a dog-free neighborhood, be prepared.