Dear you,

I am sorry that the people that love you don't understand the way it feels to always be told to be different, to change or to improve yourself. I'm sorry that those people that ask you to either be more or be less whether you're the person who likes to sit quietly by the wall at the party and enjoy everyone from afar or are the one who is standing on every table, singing all the lyrics and having the time of your life, don't understand the way it cuts you when they tell you to change.

I want you to know that I've seen you, and I think you're wonderful the way you are. I've seen you sitting around minding your own business, just enjoying the group and all of a sudden everyone is yelling at you and doing what they think is encouraging you to "engage more with us, come on! Do something!" I've seen you just enjoying life, skipping down the street and telling jokes while walking with your friends and they go "come on be quiet, don't be extra!" I have seen you and I have grieved for you as I watched it break a tiny part of you, and I am so sorry.

I want you to know that those people are wrong. I want you to know it, not just on an intellectual level, but on an emotional level, that you don't deserve that, that there is nothing wrong with you, and please, for the love of all that is dear, when you go home at night do not hurt yourself over what these people have said to you.

Please, do not let the words of the people you love who do not fully understand what it is like to be on an extreme to penetrate so far through you that their words become your own running through your head, leaving jagged scars as they cut you over and over and over. Please, remember those words are wrong and have always been wrong from the moment they entered your friend's mind and finally left their lips to the moment they became your own, they are wrong.

You are wonderful. I appreciate that you can be you. I appreciate that I get to sit with you and understand you and learn about somebody who is different than myself. I don't want you to conform, I don't want you to listen to those people, who are so lovely in so many ways but who just can't understand because they don't know what it's like to be you.

They don't understand what it is like to have parts of you that you can't change and don't really want to change. You are wonderful just the way you are, and please, when anybody makes you feel like you are anything but wonderful at any time, come back and read this and remember how loved and appreciated you are for being exactly as you are.

All my love, enthusiasm and support,

Jaleh