An Open Letter To The Me That I Used To Be
Start writing a post

An Open Letter To The Me That I Used To Be

I remember the long nights where sleep didn't exist, but the nightmares did.

An Open Letter To The Me That I Used To Be

To the person that I used to be...

I needed to be you to become me. I watched you suffer so much heartache on your way to becoming me.

I remember.

I remember the nights you had to literally pick yourself up off the bathroom floor. Those nights happened often in your teen years. I remember the nights you slept there on the cold tiles because you felt safe there. Where their words couldn't hurt you anymore.

You hid on the floor and wore your tears as armor against the rest of the world. I watched you wipe your tears in the mirror and gaze into your own eyes, not knowing who she was looking back at you.

I remember the silent, quiet prayers that softly crept past your lips when you had lost all hope. You asked for guidance. For strength. For help. For love. For healing.

I remember your heart physically hurting from the heartbreak you felt and the bruises on your chest you gave yourself from squeezing your heart too hard because you thought if you didn't, it might fall out of your chest.

I remember the hurt you endured to become me.

The lessons you learned and the battles you fought. I remember the long nights where sleep didn't exist, but the nightmares did. I remember the cuts where words that were spoken left marks where they fell on your heart. The places they fell are just scars now, but sometimes they ache in memory of the past.

The you that I endured to become myself today is someone I do not mourn because she still exists. She is the me inside that swells with pride when I look back on the past and know I've moved on.

She is still me. I respect her. I learned from her. She was buried and planted so that I may bloom and grow.

So to the me that I used to be,

I am still you. But because of you I was able to grow, adapt, and learn.

My heart has long healed and wears its scars proudly. She does not flaunt them, but she does not hide them. They are a part of her as much as the freckles on her cheeks.

She is me, and I am you.

And I am proud of you. Then. Now. Always.

And to the person, I want to be... I will be you. One day. And she will still be here. My past self, rooting for you as always.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

In an already unprecedented political landscape, things aren't looking so bright for mail-in voters heading into November's election. In 46 states and Washington D.C., post offices received a warning that mail-in ballots may not be counted on time to count on election day, according to a report by the Washington Post.

Keep Reading... Show less

"New Girl" is one of the best sitcoms of all time. Honestly, it is so much fun to watch, so much fun to relate to, just all around a great show.

Not only is a great show, it has so many different great settings, obviously including the loft. If you live by Nick Miller quotes and desperately tried to learn how to play "True American," you need to buy these things because you are a true "New Girl" fan.

Keep Reading... Show less

You know those items you've been pinning to your Home board on Pinterest for [insert amount of time]? Well, it's officially the moment to turn that wishlist into a married life reality, and it's going to be SO fun.

But, before you get to shopping and adding things to your upgraded bridal wishlist (sorry, Pinterest, it was lovely while it lasted), you'll first want to decide where you want to open your registry (or registries, if you want options). Here are 17 of the best websites and stores to consider saying "I do" to for your wedding registry, to have and to hold for as long as people are buying you wedding gifts.

Keep Reading... Show less

If you've ever been in the dating game, or currently are, chances are you've had a date gone wrong. These are often times super embarrassing, but they are always funny to look back on.

Keep Reading... Show less

I just recently got engaged and planning a wedding during a pandemic is actually kind of a nightmare.

A lot of venues are taken for 2021 because of corona brides and grooms who have had to reschedule their weddings and the same goes for other vendors and literally everything else.

Keep Reading... Show less

While promoting her most recent movie, "Work It," Sabrina Carpenter has divulged some of her favorite beauty products to interviewers.

Keep Reading... Show less

When I say we can't stop thinking about the relationship advice Miley Cyrus dropped on "Call Her Daddy" today, I mean it literally.

Her truth bombs hit me (and most who listened) like a wrecking ball and coupled with the release of her new song "Midnight Sky," we're going to need some time to process the greatness. In case you haven't listened yet (what are you waiting for?), here are 10 relationship tips Miley shared that we should all live by for the rest of time.

Keep Reading... Show less

Founders Of Color: Rec Room's Dre Taylor On What Blackness Can Look Like And Not Working For Free

"It mattered to me that when we were depicting racial diversity for Rec Room, we showed the broad spectrum of what Blackness can look like."

Rec Room

The world of sustainable fashion is inundated with marketing gimmicks, false advertising, and large corporations cutting corners — Rec Room is the pure antithesis of that.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 At-Home Therapy Tips You Need, No Matter What Your Therapy Routine Is

Whether you're in a Zoom session or live-chatting, make sure your home therapy space is good to go.

No matter what stigmas you held about therapy before this year, I'm sure 2020 has affirmed that we could ALL use a nice long therapy session. Between wildfires that took over an entire continent, a global health crisis, and what's sure to be one giant circus of an election in the United States, we need help and we need it now.

The fact of the matter is, therapy has been a helpful, valid resource long before the world decided to become one giant dumpster fire. Having a safe space to discuss what's going on in your life, worries you have, and struggles you're facing has become a very normal thing for individuals' mental health.

Keep Reading... Show less

Dunkin' just announced that they'll be releasing their fall menu earlier than ever — set to debut on August 19 — and that it'll include new menu options this season, including a new signature pumpkin spice latte. Let me just say, Starbucks has some fall-menu competition now.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments