Dear Not-So-Nice Guys,

I walked into our student union to get lunch on an empty Saturday. There were two attractive boys in front of me as I walked in, and one held the door open for me. (It always makes my day when young men do that kind gesture.) However, my opinion of them changed just as fast as their conversation changed:

Boy 1: "How's (insert females name here)?"

Boy 2: "Good but she keeps asking for a relationship. When will she realize I'm only using her for sex..." **cue laughter**

Boy 1: "The longer it takes the better right?"

Boy 2: "Yeah maybe I'll just let her keep thinking a relationship is coming; it makes it more fun for me.."

They then left with their Chick-fil-A as I stood horrified at the filth and amount of disrespect that came out those boys' mouths. I regret not speaking to them, so I decided to dedicate this post to the not-so-nice guys in the world. Y'all have the potential and ability to be good guys... but just seem to have missed the mark.

Maybe you are the guy who talks to five girls at once and leads them to believe that you care for each of them, and only them, in a special way. Then they find out about the others and suddenly all of them feel worthless.

Maybe you were just "joking" about the girl who you called fat behind her back but she ended up hearing about it and now she feels worthless.

Maybe you are the guy who cheated on the one girl who cared for you and loved you more than any other girl ever did, leaving your faithful girlfriend of two years to feel worthless.

Maybe you have even just texted a girl and hung out with a girl alone often, even though you knew you were doing it just because she would respond and fall for you, then you ditched her.

Maybe you think it is okay to share those pictures you begged the young girl to send you. You sent them to all of your friends, and their friends, and their friends. **girls: never send pictures of yourself you wouldn't post on your own public Facebook account**

Maybe you are the guy who led a girl on for a whole semester and had deep talks with her about how you respected the fact she was a "good girl" only to make her feel stupid and worthless when you had sex with a random girl while still playing her.

Here's the deal, in my opinion, you aren't even mean.. you are just "not-so-nice." There is good deep down in that cold heart. I know you are probably nice to your mother and nice to the strangers you encounter daily. You might even hold the door open for random girls. I bet you have even volunteered before, or have given a homeless man a dollar. Your mom probably brags through her posts about you on her Facebook, and they are probably all true. However, you are picking and choosing who you wish to be nice to, and for some reason some girls are not who you always want to be nice to. You take your anger and need for an ego boost out on girls who can easily fall for you by manipulating them for your personal gain. For some reason, you can respect strangers better than girls your own age who care about you.

One of my guy friends (who is one of the good guys in this world) described those of your species as: good guys, but not-so-nice. You probably make a good friend to those who can call you friend, but you probably aren't suitable to be a boyfriend. You live the best of both worlds as Hannah Montana called it, but a good guy to the public and on social media, but a jerk to the girls who are victims of the games you play. You are not-so-nice and that is what you are.

I get it; guys have it hard. Your hormones are crazy and your sex drive is out of this world and you struggle with those temptations "way more" than girls struggle with them. And girls make mistakes in this process as well; they could have seen the signs and seen your not-so-nice personality come about. They shouldn't have trusted you or believed your lies. How stupid of them to trust you. Believe me, I get it, and despite what you think this letter is not meant to shame you or make you feel bad. This letter is a warning letter for your sake.

One day chances are you will have a daughter and I have a feeling that you not-so-nice boys will chose to be nice to your daughter. In fact, I think you will be great fathers. You will be her soccer coach, drive her to ballet classes, maybe even grill burgers for her and your beautiful family. You will love her more than any girl in the world and wish nothing but the best for her. But she is going to come to you one day, crying about some boy who made her feel worthless. Or worse, she will be crying with the door shut as you knock on it praying your baby girl will open up and talk to you about why she is so sad and questioning her worth all of the sudden. You will find out that she is crying about some boy who lead her on, cheated on her, and/or lied to her. You are going to be mad at this boy, who made your beautiful and perfect daughter feel inadequate for love because he didn't realize how beautiful she was and how much respect she deserved. You are gonna watch her feel worthless when you know she is worth so much more and suddenly you will realize the tables have turned. I feel bad for you not-so-nice boys because in that moment every girl who you ever made feel worthless, ugly, and disrespected will flash before your eyes as you wipe the tears off your daughters cheeks.

There are many nice guys out there which prove to me y'all have the potential to be better. I recently had a fraternity guy at my school send me a text including scripture and making me feel more welcomed and loved by him and his peers. I have even seen other guys at parties take care of girls who got too drunk making sure they did nothing they regretted. These were genuine nice guys. I'm not saying you have to babysit girls or send them bible verses, but maybe just maybe you can treat every girl how you would like your future daughter to be treated. You can be a nice guy instead of a not-so-nice guy.

I hope you change for your sake. I hope you realize that abusing girls over and over again will not make you feel more manly or more "frat." I hope you realize the potential you have to be a nice guy who respects everyone and treats every girl he encounters the way he wishes his daughter would be treated by guys when she is in her most vulnerable years. Because there is nothing sadder than a pretty boy with an ugly heart.

Sincerely,

Every Girl

And to the not-so-nice girls out there, because I know there are plenty of y'all and am not naive to the fact that girls can hurt guys and fellow girls, I have a few words for y'all but that will be saved for another week.