When I was a freshman in college, everyone consistently told me to go to office hours with my professor. I was so afraid to make a fool of myself to a professor with a PhD from an Ivy League university that I wouldn't go. After failing an exam for my soils science class (oh yes, this class exists), I knew I had to ask my professor for help. I ended up going to office hours every week for the rest of the semester to get help. Here's what I learned each by the end of that semester.
1. Come in with specific questions
This may seem obvious, but I realized quickly that asking general questions did not help me learn. I had to go through each part of an assignment and pick out what it was that I failed to understand. I would write post-it notes filled with specific questions. My professor and TA appreciated that I was engaged with the material and my questions were much easier to answer.
2. Do not say "I don't get it"
To be more clear, do not go into office hours and just say you don't get the lecture material. Your professor will look at you with contempt. You have to say where in a lecture you no longer understood or what specifically you struggled to grasp. Highlight where you got lost and you can refer to it during office hours.
3. Care about more than your grade
Soil science was not supposed to be a difficult class. Turns out soil has physics and I do not get along with physics. I would lament to my professor that I couldn't get a bad grade in this class and he would always remind me it is about learning. The more interest I showed in learning the material, the more helpful my professor was. I should have failed that class. He gave me a C because he knew that I genuinely wanted to know the material.
4. It is OK to show frustration
I always went in with my poker face to my professor. After failing the second exam, I had enough. I went to office hours and did everything I could to understand the material. Once again, I sat in the office with a failing grade. My professor looked at me and tried to say I failed less than last time. I looked at him with tears in my eyes. I didn't cry, but I showed that this wasn't OK. He then made extra time in his week to sit down with me. On top of that, he got into contact with a student in the class in the same position as me to work together on studying. It helped me immensely to work with someone and we eventually did better in the class.
Professors want you to do well so long as you show them you care. Office hours are a great way to build a relationship with them and understand the material better. Do not go in without being prepared and follow these guidelines to make sure you know what you're doing. Professors aren't as scary as they seem. They happen to be people too.
