me too
Start writing a post
Friendships

my first love

Loving someone for the first and last time..

7
my first love

I guess we never forget our first loves. You where the wolf in sheep's clothing that everyone warned me about. I was so attracted to the outer appearance, and your words, all the things you said that you loved about me where the same exact reason I was taught when I was younger to hate about myself. See what people don't realize is that same kid that was bullied still grows up to become an adult. That same kid that you bullied from middle school has feelings and a memory that is priceless. The times that I was ever harassed, bullied, or talked about, for some reason those seemed to stick with me into high school. Me thinking that I was fat, unattractive, and would never be loved. The countless number of times that I would come home from school and cry to my mother and father about what someone had said about me. Those haunting memories that leave me to fear about having my own children. You changed that in me, you were my first love. I remember my mother telling me that constantly, "you're not in love Amanda" and I would always think to myself, she doesn't even really know how I feel about him. My dad always told me if you really want to find out who someone is just spend enough time around them and they will reveal themselves to you, and surely you did. In the early months, I didn't see it then as well I can now, but if anyone is ever trying to change who you are just to fit the criteria of who they want you to be, you don't need that person in your life. I had started to change myself into someone that I wanted him to like better and to find more attractive to him just to get his attention. After trying to change me came the mental abuse and harassment. I guess the part of me that still questions to this day is why continue to stay with someone like this, and my reasoning is because he was the first person outside of my family that made me feel like I was someone special. Then came the day that he stole a piece of me that could never be replaced or simply put back. My innocence was gone and shortly after so was he...

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

55565
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

35821
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

957834
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

186160
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments