What To Say To Someone With Anxiety
Start writing a post

As Someone Who Struggles With Anxiety, I Cannot Stand It When People Say 'Calm Down'

"Calming down" is not going to fix this.

As Someone Who Struggles With Anxiety, I Cannot Stand It When People Say 'Calm Down'

Anxiety is prevalent among not only college students, but most young adults in today's age. As someone who has anxiety, I know just how hard it can be to deal with it. From the constant worry, to the panic attacks, to everything else anxiety-related, it is a lot for one person to deal with. That's why it's so important for someone with anxiety to have a support group who understands them. However, there are many things that you should not say to someone with anxiety because it does not help them. While many of them are not great, there is one thing that people tend to say to anxious people that gets on my nerves.

"You need to calm down."

Now I know what you're thinking, you're asking yourself how could something with innocent meaning not be innocent at all? Well, let me explain this to you because it's some valuable information to know if you ever are dealing with an anxious person.

I will admit, it's definitely easy to think that telling someone to calm down while they are having a panic attack is not bad or harmful. But the truth is, someone who is extremely anxious or panicking cannot just simply "calm down." Anxiety is not something someone can just simply "snap out" of. Anxiety is NOT the same thing as someone who is just simply overreacting to something.

Anxiety is never an overreaction — telling someone to "calm down" implies that it is.

Also, as I said, it is simply not easy for someone who is having a panic attack to simply calm down. As much as we would love to suddenly feel calm, that's just simply impossible with anxiety. In fact, feeling the need to calm down while having a panic attack may make the person feel worse since they may not have any way to fully control their anxiety at the moment. So in the end, telling someone to just calm down mid panic attack is simply pointless.

Truth be told though, I believe that most people don't really mean any harm when they tell an anxious person to calm down. It's most likely that others without anxiety may not realize how unhelpful it can be to tell an anxious person to calm down.

Thankfully, there are other things that you can do or say to help an anxious person out.

You can ask them what they need from you, listen to them if they need to talk, or even just simply sit there and be by their side while they work through their emotions. All you need to do is be an understanding person to them without exhibiting any type of bias or judgment, and you'll be good to go when dealing with an anxious person.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments