The Low In Lonely

I have a very blessed life. Because of this, I sometimes feel guilty when I wish things were just the slightest bit different. It's the constant problem that we face as humans: we want something we don't have, and then when we get it, we want what we had before. We never seem to be satisfied in our current season of life; we always want to fast forward to the next season. For example, right now I am a single 20-something year old girl with a great job and amazing friends, and yet my mind constantly wanders to thoughts of being lonely or single for the rest of my life. While now is the time for me to live up my twenties and take advantage of only being responsible for myself, I waste time worrying about the things that are out of my control.

It's natural. Any single girl in their mid-twenties is bound to have a few moments where she worries about her relationship status in the future. These days, it seems like there are only two types of women: the ones who marry young and then the ones who become lonely old cat ladies. So it's no secret that loneliness or the fear of growing old alone is something that many young women wrestle with. For the majority of us, we are taught from a young age that we are going to grow up to be wives and moms, and when our lives don't follow that exact timeline, we start to freak out.

Here is what I've learned: there is no point in spending precious hours of life worrying about the future. We all live life on our own timelines, there is not some magic formula that we can all follow in order to end up at a certain place at the exact same time as everyone else. Because of this, there is not a perfect age to get married or to be in a relationship or to start a family - it's all unique to you as an individual. Who's to tell us that, because we are a certain age, it's strange that we're single or married or pregnant? Making yourself feel low because you may be at a point in your life where it is just you is no way to live.

It's also important to note that there is a big difference in being alone and being lonely. A lot of people try to make it seem as if being alone is miserable; however, being alone can be a wonderful thing. It is an opportunity to grow more as a person and to learn more about yourself. It's also a time to cherish the fact that you are solely responsible for yourself, and with that comes a lot of freedom. Loneliness, on the other hand, is when you are sad that you're on your own and you make yourself feel bad about that fact.

I would be lying if I said that one of my greatest fears wasn't ending up lonely. It's something that I think about frequently. The important thing to remember is that I'm young, and while it may seem like everyone around me is in a relationship or is having a baby, that's just not where I'm at in this time of my life. I'm living life on my own timeline, and while loneliness is a scary thing, it's not something that I need to worry about. Now is the time to enjoy being single, to go on adventures, and to enjoy being alone.