I'm at an odd stage of life where many expect me to be a thriving independent adult, and some argue that I am still very much a child. As somebody who is quite duty-driven, I find this mixed expectation very distressing. It's less about impressing a bunch of strangers, and more about being unsure of what I expect from myself— being unsure of what I should expect from myself.

I would consider myself childish, especially in comparison to my peers, both in my lack of real-life experiences and (even more so) in my choice of interests and hobbies. Somehow I have become gifted at hiding my insecurity about this behind a goofy smile and a few carefully selected words. More plainly, I'm friendly, so people assume that I take pride in my youthful spirit. And because I'm an English major, I can communicate in a manner that masks the extent of my naivety about literally everything.

So far my writing has greatly conflicted with the headline, right? For somebody who supposedly isn't ashamed, I'm being very vocal about my insecurities. However, I think that speaking about insecurities is how one becomes confident; I'm not entirely confident yet, but I am not ashamed.

So here's why I love Disney— here's why I will always promote my love for Disney as one of my most prominent character traits: Walt Disney himself believed that a youthful character and outlook is a virtue. And even still, the characters of the stories produced in his name articulate that belief.

In a way, I do envy the realists as they're called. The world seems less critical of them, and it seems that many people are determined to see those who dare to see the world through an optimistic lens punished for their obviously horrific crime. I try not to heed the negative words of others, but it is impossible to ignore the nudging of time, which tells me that I have to grow up— I have to change somehow.

But I think of when Walt Disney said, "That's the real trouble with the world. Too many people grow up." And I wonder what he meant exactly, but it makes me feel better. It makes me believe it's okay to always be myself, as childlike as I may be. It makes me consider the difference in being childish and being childlike.

I wish I could always arrive at clear and concise answers when I write, but that is rarely the case. But maybe I'm writing to communicate my thoughts as they are— and my thoughts are never so neatly packaged. They are always questioning, always wondering, always dreaming, always hoping for the best— and that is why I love Disney.