Transitioning from being a kid to an adult is, in essence, a long drawn-out goodbye.
Young adults begin to transition away from their kid self quicker than one may think. Some high school students feel as though they need to act out in order to gain independence from their parents. However, I have found that most students end up doing exactly as they "should," being that they get their homework done, get good marks in school, are involved in activities, and have a lot of friends who are healthy influences on them.
For many of these students (and their parents), the process of saying goodbye to home does not begin until May 1, when they choose which school they are going to attend for the next couple years. At this point, a student about to enter college has so many thoughts and dreams going through their head. They dream of painting their faces for college football games, and tailgates, and parties, and meeting people. They dream of getting a job and getting prepared for their dream job in the future. And finally, yes, it is true, they dream about school and classes.
Young adults waiting to get to college should be excited! It is an amazing and formative time. Some of the classes you take and the people who you meet will stick with you your entire life. Absorb it and take it in.
College is the ideal transition time from childhood to adulthood. It is in principal, adulthood with a safety net. This is a phenomenal tool that makes the transition a lot less scary for students. However, I often wonder if this transition is tougher on parents. If it were possible to get a good job right out of high school and be able to sustain yourself adequately right then, would parents prefer that? Or would they still want their kid to spend four years in a place that is fraught with other young people from roughly 18-22? Which does a better job of facilitating one's process of growing up? These are interesting questions.
I personally would advocate for college--outside of the fact that it is integral to any sort of financial success in life unless you happen to be 7 feet tall, or an amazing singer, or just lucky. College is so much more than just a platform to prepare you to succeed in the economy. It is a place for you to find you! Yes, that may sound cliché, however I will apply one of my personal mantras for life upon that cliché statement, being that "it is cliché for a reason." It makes sense and is true!
There really is never another time when you get the opportunity to sit and read and study ancient texts, and discuss modern problems in this way. Your mind has the opportunity to grow so much in the four years of time that you spent at university. You learn how to learn. There is a development of learning and knowledge far beyond that of what existed in high school. In high school you were taught to be a sponge. Absorb, and when squeezed, spit it back out. If you could do that well, voila! Success! However, in college it is different. You are taught to be much more than that. Yes, absorb. However, what you absorb you need to sit on it, and think about what it is that you absorbed. Then, you need to synthesize all that you have learned and be able to coherently think about how it all fits together and how the knowledge that you have gained can be applied to the real world, and real problems.
The knowledge that you gain in college is not only gained in the classroom. Most likely the most valuable lessons on life will be learned outside of the classroom. These include social skills and relating to people, which probably will yield better results in the future in regard to your career than the fact that you know how to derive and solve equations in vector calculus. (Still, it is important to know how to do that, depending on your career path of course.)
Parents are often worried about their child leaving home. Understandably so, yet they should have more faith in their children. If they haven't completely screwed up yet, there is a good chance that they won't. Remember that! Enjoy the long drawn-out goodbye that college is. Your kin will return home during breaks and they will most definitely still keep in touch. Even if it sometimes incited by the fact that some believe their parents to be ATMs. Even so, it is keeping in touch. And often times good catching up will occur before they clandestinely ask for a couple of twenties.
Enjoy watching your child grow up into the adult that they will become and the adult that they already are! Enjoy your finished product. As a parent, you will reap the benefits later, in gratitude and funding for your in-home care nurses.
The long drawn-out goodbye of college is a good one. It is tough, it is great--it changes and molds people into the great adults they will hopefully become.
