Confident Women, Don't Allow A Relationship To Dictate Your Life
Start writing a post
Relationships

Confident Women, Don't Allow A Relationship To Dictate Your Life

What to do in a relationship-driven world.

307
Confident Women, Don't Allow A Relationship To Dictate Your Life
Priscilla Du Preez

I haven't written an article in a while because my summer has been insanely busy with work, vacations, and friends. This summer has been one of the best yet, filled with adventure and new experiences. However, my summer began on a low note.

The day I returned home for summer break my boyfriend of over a year broke my heart. Well, summer continued, and once most of the emotions and hurt passed, I began to really enjoy, love, and appreciate life in a whole new light. I've discovered new things about myself, experienced new circumstances, grew closer to Christ, and learned a lot about relationships.

For too many people, especially female college students, their world revolves around finding their significant other. Girls nowadays are actively pursuing guys in every moment of their life. I am not saying there is anything wrong with this, but do not allow it to dictate your life as you behave and dress in a manner to impress a certain boy. You will begin to lose yourself in the process. I know because I was one of those girls.

Even in my relationship, I found myself becoming more interested in what he liked and disliked and complacently agreeing with him rather than focusing on discovering who I was in the relationship. I was no longer Jamie Eiland. I was just a sad imposter harboring a fake identity for someone who in the end shattered my fragile exterior. But, I'm glad he did, or else I would not have discovered the strong, independent woman who had been suppressed as a result of my conformity.

Now, I am not saying that you shouldn't learn about your significant other's likes and dislikes or be interested in them. You should obviously find common interests with the person you're dating. However, a relationship is about two people who grow and learn from one another because of their differences. Trust me, it'll get boring really quick if you are both the same person.

To those of you in a relationship, I encourage you to find interests and hobbies outside of your relationship as well as in your relationship. This will significantly make the relationship healthier and happier! If you are in a relationship, I am happy for you and glad that you found someone to do life with! But, just remember that you are your own person as well. Don't conform to anything that goes against your identity.

For those who are single and just looking for a Pringle, keep being uniquely you! For those girls who are in their 20s, I encourage you to discover and explore new things about yourself. Go outside your comfort zone at times to learn and grow into the person God created you to be. This is a special time in your life that you won't be able to get back. We need to spend it drawing closer to Christ, not pursuing some guy.

Just be yourself, focus on you, have close guy friends, and God will do the rest. We live in a relationship driven world where girls are always thinking, "Oh he's cute" or "I need a boyfriend." There are so many greater things in God's creation to focus on. Please, do not create a tunnel vision that only focuses on guys. I promise, there is a lot more to live for. I love my life and discovering new things about myself and who I want to be, without being distracted by a relationship. I encourage you to do the same.

I am not saying that every day I feel empowered and amazing to be single. I am still hurt from my breakup and rediscovering how to be on my own again. But, I keep thinking to myself, "I am a strong, independent woman who don't need no man." Ladies, I cannot stress this enough: be the girl that no man can date.

I'm not saying completely shut yourself off from dating, but be the girl that is so confident in herself and her relationship with Christ that she doesn't need to change herself to find a boyfriend. Live your life independently and freely exploring all the beautiful things in God's creation and love your life as it is!



Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

92450
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

70976
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments