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Learn To Love Deeply Without Dependency

Do not let dependency be what is gluing you together.

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couple holding fingers with anchor tattoos

There is nothing worse than going through a heartbreak. Not only that, but it's impossible to avoid. Your heart will be broken many times throughout life. However, it is possible to protect yourself in a healthy way while not shutting the world out.

Over this past summer, I opened my heart up to people who I thought I could trust. That in itself is not a bad thing. It's good to open up and let people in. My mistake wasn't that; it was letting myself start to fully depend on those people. I expected them to always be there. I grew dependent.

This is not to say that you shouldn't depend on people whatsoever. You should hold expectations and standards. But don't let someone else hold you together. Do not depend on someone to hold your hand through dark times 100% of the time. I cannot emphasize how important it is to have a strong support system within yourself. Yes, you should have a support system outside of yourself. You should be able to love people and depend on them to be there for you. But do not let dependency be what is gluing you together.

You can get through the dark times without that person. You can make it out of the troubled waters without someone throwing you a life vest. Learn how to swim. Support yourself as much as you can. At the end of the day, you will always be you. That will never change. So make sure that you have a sturdy foundation that is not sitting on top of someone else.

With all of that being said, you can still love deeply. Love who that person is. Cherish them. Let them see the real you. But do that while holding your own self up. You can be the glue to keep the pieces together. Unfortunately, there will be moments when those pieces fall apart again and again. But you can piece them back together. You don't have to do it by yourself. Have loved ones help you, but it is you that you should depend on.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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