You Know You're Obsessed With The Holidays When...
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You Know You're Obsessed With The Holidays When...

The sheer joy that comes from this peppermint and snow filled time of year

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You Know You're Obsessed With The Holidays When...
The Globe and Mail

Cold weather, hot drinks and the smell of cinnamon everywhere you go. These are just a few markers of the changing mood that's settling over us all. The holidays mean something different to everyone. To some, it signifies that euphoric time it is suddenly acceptable to sit in one place wearing a cable-knit sweater and shovel cookie after cookie into your mouth, forcing them down with horrifically large gulps of hot chocolate.

To others, it's the time of year when you're forced to wear jeans and walk into the cold outdoor air which is the equivalent to a slow, cruel torture. However, if you share in the holiday cheer, and sheer joy that comes from this peppermint and snow filled time of year, there are certain signposts that each of us notice and mark when it gets back to this time of year.

To start with the obvious, the weather is changing. It's gray and gloomy, the colorful hues of red and orange leaves have fallen to their deaths from the tops of the trees. It gets dark by 6 p.m. This, however, makes you feel better about lying under a pile of blankets, watching obscene amounts of Netflix, and tossing back hot drinks as if you're life depended on it.

You wear a mass amount of over-sized sweaters, some of them displaying grotesquely knitted reindeer and snowflakes. And with this comes the idea of the "winter bod." Nobody can tell what's under that blob of a sweater. So what the hell, you eat that third helping of creamy tomato soup and grilled cheese.

Your motivation level to do anything other than watch holiday classics on repeat has suffered a similar fate to that of a goldfish; a funeral held in its honor and then flushed quickly down the toilet. All this talk of "finals" and getting things "in order" before the long winter break is taking a serious toll on your holiday spirit, and so the only rational thing to do was to forget your responsibilities entirely. Your mood has improved since this decision.

To be more specific about what exactly you're watching on Netflix, we're talking the cheesiest of cheesy movies. Hallmark channel romances, you know the holiday rom-coms that didn't even make it on daytime television. And you don't just watch them, you get so invested in these movies that you actually yell, out loud, explicitly what the characters are doing wrong to the unresponsive computer screen. Their torment is your torment, their winter wonderland romance is your romance... if only you could meet a special someone in a blizzard and immediately realize your joint love of the winter was really a love for each other.

Your browser history probably displays a horrific amount of holiday baking recipes. All of which you probably won't even attempt to make, but instead go to the bakery section at your local grocer and buy everything that catches you eye. Maybe you'll attempt to stick with baked goods that keep in theme with your pinned holiday desserts, but more likely than not you stick with the cheap stuff; and cradle it in your arms like it's a child as you cram the assorted goodies into your mouth through the tears that "White Christmas" always brings.

And let's not forget...the socks. It's now actually applauded and supported when you put the most hideous designs known to man on your feet for the world to see. Reindeer, odd zig-zag patterns, Christmas lights, terribly cheesy holiday greetings... all in the form of socks. You wear them with Birkenstocks, tennis shoes, boots, ah to hell with it, maybe even flip flops. They aren't appreciated by all, but boy when you find another kindred sock spirit...

All these things really add up to is a visible object of an obsessive, but not unhealthy, nature towards cheer and good tidings. For those that don't share the obsession, yes it's plausible, you may actually still have a form of motivation. And yes, maybe the amount you watch Netflix remains at a healthy level. Maybe you do save a fair amount of dollars from not buying something every time you walk past the holiday decoration aisle. But what can you expect from those of us that that start counting down the days to the holiday season as soon as it ends? You're lucky we don't start celebrating in June at the six-month mark...


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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