Being The Daughter Of An Alcoholic Changed Me Into A Hardworking, Compassionate, And Empathetic Woman

Being The Daughter Of An Alcoholic Changed Me Into A Hardworking, Compassionate, And Empathetic Woman

There isn't an answer or how this is done, it just is.


In 2012 my mother went to jail for the first time and got a DWI for blowing over the legal limit to drive while having consumed alcohol. The following month she went to Rehab for the first time. I was 15 years old.

My father was not in my life, my grandmother could only help out so much, and I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone besides a select few about what was going on in my life. I was 15 with no parental guidance or a decent support system. I was on my own with very little guidance. I was homeless nearly 4 separate times in my life, almost died because of it once, and had my own money stolen from me more times than I count.

My whole world was falling apart, and I was isolating my emotions by putting on a show. I cried myself to sleep for months and couldn't sleep longer than 4 hours. I had no one to turn to and I was not myself. I was beginning to lose my innocence and there was no way I could regain it. I was becoming an adult as a 15-year-old girl who had no idea what to do.

Have you ever met someone like this? It could be your friend, family member, or even that one person you don't like that much. Either way, we're all out there. Screaming for someone to help us, to save us, to just BE THERE for us.

I could tell you my sob story, or about every single time I had to pick her up from the side of the road from drinking too much or those couple times I was homeless and had nowhere to call home. No, this is not that story. This is how I became a better person.

I've thought for days about what I could do to change my life and I tried screaming into the abyss, writing incredibly kitschy and cringe-worthy poems so that maybe I could finally become the Tumblr girl I always wanted to be, and none of that helped. It's been nearly 7 years since this incident and I have just now stopped trying to survive.

Most of us kids of alcoholics don't like to wear what our parents do on our sleeve or post about it on social media because who wants their parents' choices to be their life? Certainly not me.

I don't have the answer to the age-old question of, "why did this have to happen to me?" All I know is what it did for me, and hopefully, this will help you as it helped me.

I just want to say that for one, I am incredibly proud of you. Being the child of an addict, in general, is stressful and causes you to lose your childhood at a young age and it breaks my heart that you had to go through that. I applaud you for not giving up and for moving forward.

I'm sorry that you had to lose part of who you are and that you didn't get to be a teenager. I'm sorry that whenever you went to college you had the fear of getting drunk with your friends, and that your emotions were so invested into your past. I'm just so incredibly sorry for your loss.

I am happy for your future and you are going to do well.

Hold on to the people that are there for you, and to the people that were there for me, I thank you in more ways than I know how to. Find the little things that make you happy and hold on to them. A support system is important despite what you might think. Having a support system has changed me and made me more trustworthy about life again.

If you can bring yourself out of that darkness and become a better person even though you have been through something that altered you, then I am so fucking proud of you. You deserve that gold medal because you are WORTHY of success and WORTHY of happiness and emotions. You are going to be okay.

It's okay to cry and scream into the void and curse just so that you can feel better. It's okay to react and to feel and to not know what to do next. If you leave with anything today, leave with this, "Don't lose hope." Hope is what is keeping me going and changed me into the woman I am today.

Being the daughter of an alcoholic not only changed me, but changed me into a hardworking, college going, compassionate, and empathetic woman. It turned me into the person who will hold on to her success, who pays her own rent, and who will never give up her freedom.

Don't allow the hard times to win.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Disney Plus

Millions of musical-lovers around the world rejoiced when "Hamilton," the hip-hop-mixtape-turned-musical harder to get in to than Studio 54, came to Disney Plus.

For those who had the luxury of being able to watch it in person and rewatch it with us mere mortals on our screens, the experience was almost as gripping as sitting feet from Lin-Manuel Miranda himself. From the stunning sets, graceful choreography, witty dialogue, and hauntingly beautiful singing, the experience was one even my musical-averse family felt moved by.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

We Asked You How You Felt About Resuming 'Normal' Activities, And Some Of Your Answers Shocked Us

The New York Times asked 511 epidemiologists when they'd feel comfortable doing "normal" activities again, considering COVID-19. We asked our peers the same thing, for science.

Last month, the New York Times surveyed about 500 epidemiologists asking about their comfort level with certain activities once deemed normal — socializing with friends, going to the doctor, bringing in the mail. That's all well and good for the experts, but they are a very niche group, not the majority of the population. What do "normal" people feel safe doing? In certain states, we've seen how comfortable everyone is with everything (looking at you, Florida), but we wanted to know where Odyssey's readers fell on the comfort scale. Are they sticking with the epidemiologists who won't be attending a wedding for another year, or are they storming the sunny beaches as soon as possible?

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Keto Is All Fun And Games Until You're Undernourished And Almost Pass Out

Keto is just another extension of diet culture that boasts rapid weight loss, but at a steep price.

Photo by LOGAN WEAVER on Unsplash

There has been a Keto diet craze going around in the past couple of years, with many of its followers claiming significant weight loss. With any new, trendy diet claiming miraculous weight-loss, one starts to wonder what exactly is happening behind the curtain. The keto, or ketogenic, diet is a very low-carb, high-fat diet that claims to help the body shift its fuel source from carbs to fat. In the medical community it has been prescribed to patients with uncontrolled epilepsy to reduce the frequency of seizures, but other than that there is little conclusive evidence to other potential benefits.

Keep Reading... Show less

Jennifer Kustanovich is not only the president of the Odyssey at Stony Brook University but is also an illuminating yoga instructor. She's an inspiring proactive leader in the wellness industry. Her expertise in movement expands onto Zumba and high-intensity interval training (HIIT).

On the last day of her in-person class, she gave everyone a way of contacting her and made sure to check up on all her clients. She wanted to ensure that they were doing okay and to remind them that she is always there.

Keep Reading... Show less

These 5 Black Female-Owned Swimwear Brands Are Must-Haves For Your HOTTEST Summer Yet

To all the woman who put their money where their mouth is, lets do two things for the price of one.

The start of summer is always exciting,(especially after an unprecedented pandemic) and people are itching to make this particular summer count. Correction: with the amount gratefulness I have for life at this moment in time I am itching to make this summer count.

But at the same time, in the midst of social justice issues, activism is something that is at the forefront of many people's minds, including mine. With money comes power and buying Black is a way to directly help the marginalized and oppressed while getting something in return.

Keep Reading... Show less

These Are The Black-Owned Restaurants In Chicago You Should Absolutely Be Supporting

Support the movement and your appetite at the same time with these amazing spots.

The Black Lives Matter movement is taking the country by storm to crash down systematic racism and liberate people of color. However, during these changing it can be hard to determine what you can do to make an impact besides reposting Instagram stories and texting petition numbers. Instead, support Black-owned businesses or, more specifically, Black-owned restaurants. Here are some outstanding and underrated Black-owned restaurants in Chicago that can help you support the movement.
Keep Reading... Show less

10 Things To Know About LDRs, From A Couple Separated By The Atlantic Ocean AND A Pandemic

There will be challenges, but more often than not, it's worth it.

Most individuals in relationships have not been able to go on romantic dates in quite a while due to business closures in the wake of the pandemic. Other couples have encountered challenges while seeing each other face to face in the past three months due to coronavirus regulations. Long-distance relationships have unfortunately become a reality for many in this era of global health crises. Western New York native and travel journalist, Chelsea Baron, knows this all too well.

Keep Reading... Show less

5 Easy Summer Mocktail Recipes You Can Make With Items You Probably Already Have On-Hand

Keep these drinks in mind next time you're visiting your local farmer's market — you might want to grab some extra mint and limes.

With Summer 2020 in full swing comes the addition of many fresh fruits and vegetables to brighten up your dinner plate, but also your glass! Farmers markets are my personal favorite place to look for produce that is in season to make fun mocktails with.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments