Colton's Virginity Should Not Be The Focus Of His Season

Colton's Virginity Should Not Be A Storyline On The Bachelor

It shouldn't have been brought up at all.

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Every fan of The Bachelor franchise is familiar with how the process works; the lead picks someone at the end of their season, and one of the other contestants (usually from the top four) becomes the next lead. After Becca Kufrin's season, we were left wondering who that could be. The obvious choices were Jason Tartick or Blake Horstmann, or maybe even Peter Kraus, or Ben Higgins. Many of us were surprised when Colton Underwood was announced, especially because he had made an appearance on Bachelor in Paradise, where he had dated Tia Booth.

It quickly became apparent that Colton was chosen for one big reason; to exploit his virginity. During Colton's last week on Becca's season, Colton revealed that he had never had sex because he had never felt deeply connected to someone enough to share that with them. That should have been the end of the topic.

While I hope for everyone's first time having sex to be a comfortable experience, virginity is not a big deal, and by no means should it be a reflection of someone or their character. Having it or losing it won't change who you are or what your values are. It is not something tangible that you can "give" to someone, it is just an experience that you will have.

Colton has every right to do whatever he wants with his body, and I respect him for waiting because he wanted to just as much as I respect anyone who's had sex because they wanted to. The heavy focus that is being put on Colton's virginity, as well as the sexual innuendos that a lot of his contestants made on the first night is disturbing. The show is putting humor on this aspect of Colton's life, and I can't imagine how bad the backlash would be if this were happening to a female lead.

Even more upsetting are the rumors (and to be fair, they are just rumors), that the women that will accompany Colton to the Fantasy Suite were offered a large sum of money to reveal what went on.

It is up to Colton when/if he will have sex, who he will do that with, and whether it will be in the Fantasy Suite or not. The fact that Colton is a virgin does not make him less of a man, and it certainly isn't why many viewers think he is not ready for this experience.

Three episodes into season Colton's season of The Bachelor, and we are finally down to only one (minor) mention of the leads virginity. Hopefully, that will continue, and the audience will be able to focus on who Colton and his contestants are as people, rather than on something that shouldn't have been harped on in the first place.

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How To Stop Being The Toxic Person That You Would Normally Cut Out Of Your Own Life

It's so much easier to pin a problem on someone else than it is to look deep within yourself and take responsibility for the things that you've done. But that's all part of growing up.

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I'm sure you've heard it before...

"Cut someone out of your life if they negatively impact your mental health."

"You need to cut off friends, family, anyone that is bad for you and your future."

"You will be so much better off once _____ is gone from your life."

At this point in your life, you've probably cut off one or more people who you believed weren't good for you. You were prioritizing yourself, and that meant letting go of someone, regardless of the memories, bond, and love that you had for them. It was probably difficult, but somewhere down the line, you knew that you did what was best for you. And you stood by that decision.

But how many times have you been the problem?

How many times have you sat down and took the time to analyze a situation, only to come to the conclusion that YOU'RE the one that's messing up? And that if you changed x, y, and z, you could save or help your relationship with your friend, family member, or significant other.

Probably not very often.

It's so much easier to pin a problem on someone else than it is to look deep within yourself and take responsibility for the things that you've done. But that's all part of growing up. At some point, I hope you realize that you weren't so perfect either, after all. And when you do, this is what I want you to think about:

We all go through different phases of our lives, and it's okay to understand and acknowledge that this phase doesn't represent the best version of yourself. Character development isn't a strict upward slope, where you start off being a shitty, underdeveloped, immature person, but then progress into being an angel. There are going to be ups and downs. There are going to be moments where you're really disappointed in yourself, and can't believe that you let yourself slip up to that degree. We all have flaws, we all make mistakes. But also all have so much potential.

As long as you're willing to put in the effort to change (because everyone around you deserves that), then you're on the right track. And I'm proud of you for having the emotional maturity to self reflect and be better. That's the first step.

And the next step is going to involve putting everything you're saying into practice. I can't promise you that it's going to be easy. And I can't promise you that you're going to drastically permanently change overnight. If I did, I would be lying. But what I can promise you is that everything you're going to do will be worth it in the long run. I hope that's enough of a reason to dig deep for a new you.

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Everything You Need To Know About The Sudan Crisis- And What You Can Do To Help

Now is not the time to remain silent.

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Sudan Military Kills Over 100 Peaceful Protesters | NowThis www.youtube.com

Turmoil is spreading in Sudan as civilians are being massacred left and right, but few are aware of the details leading up to and regarding the calamity. Here is everything you need to know about the crisis in Sudan.

Civilians began to protest against President Omar al-Bashir as his presidency was one of violence and suffering. Under his rule, thousands of villagers were murdered by the government militia in 2003, and millions of Sudanese people were displaced from their homes. While the president was charged with genocide and war crimes, the charges were dropped when the government failed to get support from the UN. Bashir was again arrested in April 2019, after three decades of rule and several large protests.

After his rule came to an end, the people demanded a democracy, and smaller, peaceful protests eventually merged into a mass civil disobedience. Sudanese authorities banned social media and cut internet and mobile data in the capital of Sudan. Recently, soldiers have begun to open fire on crowds of protestors, rape women and men, and beat the protestors that remained on the streets. So far, it is estimated that over 100 people have been killed, 70 raped, and 700 injured. Among these numbers are hundreds of young children.

These people have no access to the outside world, or basic necessities like food and water. Instead of remaining silent and waiting for our country to step in, do your part and 1. Share this article informing others of the crisis 2. Sign this petition demanding the UN investigate this atrocity 3. Donate something to this GoFundMe raising money for Sudanese medical aid. Every share, signature and donation can and will make a difference.

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