I'm Sorry For Being Me
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Health and Wellness

I'm Sorry For Being Me

I know I might be a lot to handle, but I am the most genuine person you will ever meet

I'm Sorry For Being Me

I know I'm an intelligent, kind and beautiful person with a beautiful heart. It hurts that most of the people I know don't see me that way and feel the need to tear me down and leave me alone. For the people who gave up on me and left, I'm sorry I wasn't good enough for you. I know I can be a lot to handle sometimes and I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for being kind of shy and letting anxiety get ahold of me when we were supposed to be having a good time. I can't help that I get so nervous that all my words come out in a jumbled mess sometimes because I never know what to say.

I didn't mean to let my eating disorder get in the way of going out to lunch or dinner with you, or making you feel like I didn't want to hangout with you, because that couldn't be further from the truth. I'm sorry that I let my bad body image get in the way of seeing you. Truth is that sometimes I can't help avoiding certain places and situations because I feel like everyone is concentrating on how "fat" I think I look and it makes me anxious.

I know I can be boring and quiet and I'm sorry. I would like to be louder, maybe even go to parties once in a while, but sometimes it's hard for me to get out of bed and I don't have the energy to do anything else because for me, that is enough.

I'm sorry for having a heart made of glass and for getting worried about the smallest things. I'm not good at love and I'm sorry if I ever did anything to hurt you.

I'm sorry for not being able to open up to you as much as you would like me to, and for building a wall around my heart. I used to tell people everything and I used to let people in, until they broke my heart over and over again.

I'm sorry for being the kind of person who gives 100% to everyone I care about even if I only get 10% back. Realize that I'm hurting because I give and I give but I never feel like I'm getting any of that love back. I'm sorry for trying to be in your life even if you don't want me anymore because I'm scared of losing you just like I've lost everyone else. I'm sorry for overwhelming you with my attention and love.

I know I get sad and cry a lot and that I sometimes need you to tell me that I will be okay. I know that sometimes I need to be reminded of the good things about me so that I could feel like I was worth something. I know you don't want to be involved with me and what I'm going through because it's "complicated". I'm sorry for constantly putting myself down. Sometimes it's hard for me to believe that I am worth it. I know that annoys you and takes a lot out of you and I'm sorry.

But, none of this is an excuse for shattering my heart and leaving me alone. I hope you remember all of the times I was there for you when you needed a shoulder to cry on and for someone to talk to. I hope you realize that I would've (and still would) done anything to make sure that you're okay, even if you don't need me anymore. All I asked for was a friend... and it hurts that I wasn't enough. I'm sorry if I was too much to deal with. But the real reason I'm sorry is because I spent my time crying over you when you didn't care about me half as much as I cared about you. I'm sorry that you thought that walking away from someone that would be there for you through everything was a good decision.

I'm sorry for being me but, I'm even more sorry that you lost the most genuine person you will ever meet.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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