If you are a consistent reader of my articles you already know that I am part of a long-distance relationship. You might have even seen some of our #ShortyAndTheGiant Instagram posts. While I do not see myself anywhere near a couples counselor or the best girlfriend on the planet, my man and I have made it through 3 years of this long-distance nonsense. I would like to argue that we have not only survived in spite of the distance but thrived because of it. And while we may have made a few mistakes, here are some ways we did it right...
We talked about it beforehand. Being in a long distance relationship means that both people must put an effort in. They also both have to be on the same page, which is why it is important that you talk about what an LDR between you two will look like. This requires a lot of trust from both sides.
We scheduled a time to talk on the phone weekly. This might seem like an obvious tip, but it is not to be overlooked. There are several reasons to do this. The foremost reason is to stay up to date with your S/O. If you are dating, I am just gonna take a wild guess and say that you have a genuine interest in what they have been doing. Another reason to schedule a time to talk is that you will have something to look forward to every week.
We remembered "quality over quantity." When you do have the chance to see each other, remember just that. Quality time is always more important than the quantity of time. Go on adventures together, cook dinner, and listen to each other while you have the opportunity.
We gave each other space. Now, this might seem contradictory to the previous points, but I imagine that many LDRs have ended in part because there wasn’t enough space given. Trying to constantly contact each other will only cause annoyance. Let your S/O miss you a little bit. I guarantee it will be beneficial.
We got creative! Yes, it’s easy to wallow in the loneliness of an LDR, giving side-eye to every happy couple you see, so it's important to have a positive perspective. Most LDRs are not easy, but they give the opportunity to be creative. Maybe you don’t always need to communicate via text or call. I’m sure that if you both own the same type of gaming console you could also stay connected that way. My boyfriend and I have stayed connected by playing phone games. We also have sent each other cards in the mail, just because. This Valentine's day we challenged each other to buy the silliest gifts we could find. Now I am the proud owner of a stuffed animal sea otter with a monocle and top-hat and he has a snazzy pair of socks with hearts and my face on them! Maybe they are complete junk, but they brought us closer together.
That's how we have made three years of long distance work. We communicated (the best we could), set aside time to talk with each other, spent quality time, got creative, and still gave each other space. If I had to do it all over again, I would and I am confident that he would agree.
Are you in an LDR? Did you find this helpful? Let me know in the comments below!