'Tis The Season Of Cuffing And I Admit That I Used To Be Anti-Relationships

'Tis The Season Of Cuffing And I Admit That I Used To Be Anti-Relationships

Being emotionally attached to someone? No, thanks.

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I did not believe in the whole idea of investing so much effort and time on someone for romantic reasons and purposes. I thought it was straight up stupid to let yourself become attached. I did not understand the logic behind being vulnerable and taking your walls down.

To be fair, I conditioned myself to be as emotionless as possible. I kept to myself. My reasoning is that people always leave. For me, it seemed like it was almost impossible to keep the same people around for a long time. I watched so many of them come and go that I built a wall to protect myself. I was not about to waste any of my time or let alone someone else take advantage of it just to end up hurting me. And, it's safe to say that I was scared, but I only wanted to be reasonable and practical.

I watched my friends get into relationships every time cuffing season came around. One by one getting snatched off the market, leaving me behind to be that designated single and bitter friend. It's not like I always talked bad about relationships. Thought I'd complain every now and then about not having a love life like the rest of my friends, I was still not a fan of getting serious with a boy. I had too much fun telling others that I had 10 different boyfriends at once.

The funny thing is that I was that friend to go and run to for relationship advice even though I lacked experience and hated the whole idea of being in love.

My friends came to me for help because my decisions wouldn't be as clouded as theirs. But, it was just all common sense to me. There was no use in making situations longer and more complicated. I tend to have a solution even before my friends would be done explaining their whole dilemma to me.

And, that was the problem. I always had a solution. I always had a backup plan. I always knew what to do next. I didn't know how to just live in the moment, which played a huge part in as to why I dealt with commitment issues. I always wanted things to go the way I planned them. I thought relationships were just not for me at all.

After convincing myself for so long that I was definitely not the type to be in a relationship, I realized that was nowhere close to the truth. It was a matter of finding someone who would make you feel at ease. I did, in fact, find that person. I learned to become comfortable and allow myself to be embrace vulnerability.

When you find your person, everything just flows easily. Yes, you're going to run into some issues, but you'll have each other to go through them. It would never just be one against the whole world.

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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There's Nothing Wrong With Meeting The Love Of Your Life On A Dating Site

In such a tech-savvy world, why are we so afraid to admit that we found love online?

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Growing up watching rom-coms like "When Harry Met Sally" and "Notting Hill," I've always been a bit of a romantic. I can't count the number of times I've constructed in my mind a completely unrealistic meet-cute where I would find the love of my life. I mean, who doesn't want their own fairy tale romance?

But in this age of social media and dating apps, the chances of accidentally bumping into your soulmate is slim to none. Dating apps like Bumble and Tinder are becoming ever so popular, with more and more individuals meeting their significant other online. So why is it that in such a tech-savvy society, people are still afraid to admit that they found love online?

I blame romantic comedies. Even though many romantic comedies are focused on being "realistic," the chances of me meeting the LOML at a carnival when he decides to climb up the Ferris wheel to talk to me (*cough* "The Notebook" *cough*) are highly unlikely. We've become so fixated on the idea of this perfect relationship that it becomes almost inferior to meet someone through a dating app.

But it's time the stigma ended. Who cares where you met your significant other? Sure, maybe you originally swiped right on Tinder with the sole intention of hooking up, but life happens.

It shouldn't matter that you didn't meet in some crazy, over-the-top fashion.

And sure, there's nothing wrong in hoping for a romantic comedy worthy meet-cute, but you shouldn't let modern cinema dictate your relationship. There's no shame in saying that you met your boyfriend or girlfriend on a dating app. I mean, what are these apps meant for? Meeting online doesn't in any way take away from the legitimacy of one's relationship. So instead of focusing on these so-called perfect moments, let's focus on building perfect relationships because life isn't always a movie.

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