Hey girl,

Listen. Run. Leave him and don't look back.

I know it will be hard, but I promise you will feel better and be happier in the future. I know he tells you what you want to hear, and he changes for about a week, but it goes back to normal after that, right?

Look, I've been there. I stayed longer way longer than I should have. I fell for every word he said. I believed things really were going to change even though they never did. I made myself miserable and beat myself up because I couldn't make things work between him and I. I lost who I was because I was so focused on him. I wanted him to see how great I was, so I became the person he wanted to be instead of who I actually was. I lowered my standards and just accepted that's how he was going to be. I kept trying to change him, but I knew deep down it wasn't going to mean anything to him.

I'm sure you two have gotten into a few arguments about how he needs to change, and he has told you he will. He probably even made a few efforts to change, but he eventually went back to his own ways. I'm sure you stayed up countless nights trying to figure out what you did wrong and what you did to deserve how you're being treated.

I promise you. You did nothing wrong, and you don't deserve that. You deserve someone who is willing to compromise on some things to make your relationship better. You don't deserve someone who tells you how things are going to be and doesn't care about how you feel. Your feelings are important, too, so stop putting yours second to his.

Asking someone to change who they are completely is unrealistic and unfair to that person, but asking someone to make minor adjustments like going out on a few days every so often. Don't just put up with it because you think things will get better. They won't. He's not going to change, and he's just going to keep feeding you lies to make you stop complaining. Don't hold on to what things could be like between you. Find someone else who is going to be everything you wanted and more. He's out there. Just be patient and stop looking for someone. He will find you.

Take a deep breath. Pick yourself up and walk away. You will be okay, and you'll find someone who is the right fit for you. It may not be right away, but you'll find him. Be strong and patient. You got this.

Sincerely,

The girl who got through it