This December, I have ultimately decided against wearing ugly Christmas sweaters, decorating, turning on the radio, and watching holiday movies on television. In other words: I'm skipping the holidays.
Between finals, a death in the family, and the usual day-to-day stressors, I haven't even had time to miss the usual festivities. I'm not usually a Grinch by nature, but this year I am embracing the label, and I'm sure I'm not the only one out there.
Here is a Grinch-y guide to skipping all (or some) of the holiday festivities, for when you just aren't feeling it:
Skipping Holiday Parties
Holiday parties are a Grinch's worst nightmare, especially those annoying ugly-sweater-themed ones. If you're in college, use the old "I really want to go but I have a final the next morning!" excuse. And if you're a desperate adult, pretend you have the flu--it's the simplest way to be disinvited to the hottest parties of the season.
Jumping Off The Caroling Bandwagon
If you aren't in the mood for holiday parties, chances are you won't want to go caroling, or even turn on the radio for the entire month of December. You'd rather just listen to Taylor Swift's new album on repeat (with earphones in) until the new year. The next time your neighbors ask to go caroling, make your voice hoarse-sounding, then tell them you've got the worst sore throat.
Sneaking Around Secret Santa
You actually have a valid excuse for this one: Poor, broke, college student. This excuse can be altered to accommodate adults still living in their parents' basement, post-graduates paying off student loans, and those who do not celebrate a winter holiday. Remember, the only thing worse than a Grinch is a Scrooge!
Passing On The Decor
I Decided not to decorate this year, which saved me a lot of time and money. Also, I'm away at college and spend a large percentage of my day in classes and at the library. Here are some additional excuses to use when your friends/family ask about your lack of holiday spirit:
1. (Insert name of animal(s)) would knock over the tree and all of my expensive ornaments, so I decided not to put one up.
2. I don't celebrate a winter holiday, so why would I decorate?
3. I had the flu/plague/some rare flesh-eating bacteria and wasn't feeling up to it.
4. Decorations represent the commercialization of (insert holiday) and I'm boycotting Amazon/big box stores/capitalism.
Nixing The Holiday Cards
It's entirely possible that you either hate or have lost touch with every single person in your address book phone contacts. Also, you were too busy to pose for a photo with your family significant other friends cats. And let's be real, you didn't want your cats upstaging you, anyways.
