Saying Goodbye To My First Pet Broke My Heart, But I Wouldn't Trade My Time With Her For The World

Saying Goodbye To My First Pet Broke My Heart, But I Wouldn't Trade My Time With Her For The World

No one goes into buying a pet thinking about the day they are going to die, but we all know that more often than not, they'll go before we do.

The heartache we feel when we lose a pet is soul-crushing. The pain of losing your first pet, however, that one stings just a bit more than most.

I knew I'd lose you someday, I just didn't know when that someday would be.

Watching you take your last breath, knowing that the last 12 years with my best friend by my side were coming to an end was devastating. I felt my entire world crumble around me.

I cried for days. I cried when I woke up, I cried throughout the day, I cried before I went to sleep at night. I still cry sometimes.

But, I wouldn't trade those 12 years for the world.

Despite the pain that came with losing you, I wouldn't turn back time and have lived the last 12 years without you just to avoid the hurt that I've experienced since you passed.

You watched me grow up, and you protected me from everyone. (Literally dad and brother couldn't even joke around with me without you getting upset at them.)

You caught my tears at night when I cried my way through being bullied in middle school.

You saw me transfer schools going into high school, and you saw me transfer schools yet again in college.

I've lost friends and made new ones, but you're the one who never left. Even now, you may be gone, but your memory and impact lives on in my heart and mind forever.

The night we lost you, I told my dad I never wanted any more dogs... or any other pet for that matter.

He told me I couldn't cancel out 12 years of happiness and great memories because of one day of badness, that, unfortunately, was inevitable.

He was right.

I will have dogs again someday, and yes, at some point, those dogs will pass on as well. No matter what we do or how badly we wish our four-legged friends could outlive us, it really isn't bound to happen.

I don't know about you, but I don't know any 80-year-old dogs out there.

We aren't guaranteed 50 years with our furry friends, by whatever design God made them, it's just not in their nature.

When I think of the nature of the time we are given with our furry friends, I think of a quote from a book I loved in high school.

"There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There's .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I'm likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn't trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I'm grateful." — John Green, "The Fault In Our Stars"

See, I knew going into it that my dog's "infinity" wasn't going to be as big as some infinities. In fact, I'm surprised that I got a 12-year infinity with her considering some dog owners don't even get that.

But, if an infinity is good, no matter how short it may be, it was worth it.

We, as a society, tend to think that longer is better because, selfishly, we want our loved one around forever. But if we truly love them, really and truly love them, we let them go when their time comes, resting in the memories we do have because if we truly love them, we don't want them here just for our own pleasure if they're suffering.

What kind of a love is that?

A selfish one...that's what.

No one goes into buying a pet thinking about the day they are going to die, but we all know that more often than not, they'll go before we do. We acknowledge that their entire life only makes up what is a small portion of ours.

I like to believe that our pets live such short lives because that's all they need to make an everlasting paw print on ours. After living through losing my first pet, I can confirm that's true.

So, yeah, losing a pet isn't easy--no one ever said it was going to be easy. But, in the end, I wouldn't trade the happiness owning a pet has brought me for anything else in the world.

You can't let the prospect of some sadness stop you from getting a pet. Because the only thing stronger than the sadness you'll feel when they're gone is the happiness you'll feel while they're here.

In honor of Olivia: 02/09/2006-03/17/2018
Cover Image Credit: Bri Cicero

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30 Bee Puns To Get You Through The Day

These puns are as sweet as honey.

There are few things in life that make me happier (and/or make me want to bury my face in my hands and groan loudly) than a well timed pun. This goes double if the pun involves some my favorite insects — bees. There's nothing quite as satisfying as uttering a bee pun when no one expects it, so here is a list of the top 30 bee puns around!

Use these puns to make your grandparents laugh, impress your date, spice up your Tinder profile, make friends with a beekeeper, break the ice at your new job or make everyone in the general vicinity wish they hadn't invited you to come hang out with them. You won't bee-lieve how many of these puns you'll be pollen for! You'll bee-come an instant hit at parties! You'll bee sure to thank me later.

1. "When a bee is in your hand, what's in your eye? Beauty. Because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder."

2. "Bee puns really sting.

3. "Who's a bee's favorite singer? Bee-yoncé."

4. "What's a happy bumblebee's blood type? Bee positive!"

5. "Bee puns aren't that great. I don't get what all the buzz is about."

6. "Wasp are you talking about?"

7. "Naughty bee children really need to beehive."

8. "What kind of bees drop things? Fumble bees!"

9. "A bee's favorite haircut is a buzz cut!"

10. "What do you call a bee that's a sore loser? A cry bay-bee!"

11. "What's a bee's favorite flower? Bee-gonias!"

12. "Why do bees get married? Because they found their honey!"

13. "That bee is talking too quietly, it must be a mumble-bee!"

14. "Bee children take the school buzz to get to school."

15. "A bee's favorite sport is rug-bee."

16. "The bees went on strike because they wanted more honey and less working flowers."

17. "On the first day of class, bee students are given a sylla-buzz."

18. "What did one bee say to the other when they landed on the same flower? Buzz off."

19. "Who's a bee's favorite painter? Pablo Bee-casso!"

20. "A bee styles their hair with a honeycomb."

21. "When a bee writes a sonnet, they're waxing poetic."

22. "The worker bee decided to take a vacation to Stingapore last year."

23. "A bee that's been put under a spell has been bee-witched!"

24. "Say, these bee puns aren't too shab-bee."

25. "That pretentious wasp is just plain snob-bee!"

26. "Why did the bee want to use the phone? To say hi to their honey."

27. "A bee's favorite novel is the Great Gats-bee."

28. "What's a bee's favorite Spice Girls song? Wanna-bee!"

29. "What do bees like with their sushi? Wasa-bee!"

30. "Remember, bee puns are good for your health, they give you a dose of Vitamin Bee!"

Cover Image Credit: Fanaru

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6 Things Pet-Less Dog Lovers Know to Be True

Dog-friendly places are your go-to spots, even if you don't have a dog.


If you're like me then you're absolutely obsessed with dogs. However, being a full-time student and working two jobs doesn't grant me the luxury of pet-ownership... yet. So, this is how I cope with trying to include animals in my lifestyle.

1. You learn all the names of the neighborhood dogs, and have your favorites

...And you get withdrawal symptoms when you haven't seen them in a while. There are three golden retrievers who live down my street, one of the families that own the oldest of the three recently adopted a Labrador retriever puppy. Walking by that house every day means that my neck is always craned, hoping for a glimpse of one of them, or seeing if they're outside.

2. You've been known to go to dog parks and dog beaches

Admittedly, it's super weird to go to a playground or kid-oriented place without a child, but when it's a dog, I think people understand that you just need some time around their furry companions. Owners have been understanding or friendly every time I've personally interacted with dogs at these venues.

3. Dog-friendly venues are immediately your favorites

Especially dog meet up events. Once again, the ones I've gone to are open to the public and including the pet-less public. Going to one of these is the equivalent of de-stressing or therapy for me.

4. You try to hang out at people's houses exclusively to be around their pets

Or else, if possible, ask them to bring their pets if they come over to your house. That's not weird, right?

5. You constantly ask for updates about your friends' pets

They're a part of the family too, and so one may ask for updates about a friends' sibling or parents, animal lovers will also inquire about their friends' pets. If your friend owns a pet, it's very likely they'll just give you updates on their own - not that you're complaining.

6. You're WAY too familiar with the question, "Can I pet your dog?"

And easily say it multiple times per day.

In conclusion, you're in a constant state of withdrawal and can't wait until the next time you're out and about to dog spot or interact with other peoples' pets.

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