We All Need Friends In This Life

What my aim in this brief piece is is to simply commend friendship as something that is not a mere bonus to a person's life, but rather an essential aspect of human life in the world. My abiding view when it comes to friendship is that God designed human beings to enjoy a wide range of relationships with other people, one of which being friendship. While I would say that people also require alone time and I would commend heartily the importance of solitude and time alone in the Bible and in prayer, I cannot stress enough that people must experience the closeness and community of friendship.

We all know that person who just seems to hate people and never want to be around others, but we also readily perceive that such an individual is rarely happy and we can't remember a time where they seemed to be enthralled by a real joy. Even in our own hearts and minds, we may struggle with feelings of loneliness when we are with people and an abiding desire to lone-wolf it throughout our lives, though we are confident that we shouldn't do it. Friendship is indeed essential to living life and is also essential to walking with God and living out the Christian life.

Biblically, when God calls people to Himself through the Gospel of Jesus Christ, He calls them into a family over which He is the Father. Also, the Bible is clear that men in women that are part of the church, meaning that they have placed their faith in Jesus Christ, are expected by God to be closely connected and in unity together, belonging to local churches and doing deep life together. There is no question from the perspective of Biblical Christianity that close, heart-level friendships are essential and vital.

But of course, this is obvious. We intuitively know that we need each other. We intuitively long to have other people intimately plugged into our lives. We know that something is wrong when we are all alone. It is true that we need God first and foremost and that He alone is necessary to give real, lasting joy and contentment, but it is also true that God designed the world according to His perfect wisdom and pleasure and that submission to His design is necessary for real living.

So, what does one do with this knowledge? How does one apply this knowledge to their lives? I will give five counsels. One, a person needs to accept this reality and cease to try to be a lone wolf. Two, a person needs to actively seek out friends and stop expecting friends to come to them. Three, it is necessary to accept too that heart-level connection is risky and yet still should be pursued. Four, a person needs to seek out a Biblically faithful local church to actually belong to. Fifth, a person needs Biblical discernment in their search for groups of friends. Though simple, these are some basic tips in this enormously important matter for human life and the Christian life even more.