Just Because I'm A Lesbian Doesn't Mean I'm Gay For My Friends
Start writing a post

Just Because I'm A Lesbian Doesn't Mean I'm Gay For My Friends

An LGBT+ label ruined some of my closest friendships.

Just Because I'm A Lesbian Doesn't Mean I'm Gay For My Friends
Sam Manns

I remember a month or so after I came out, one of my relatively close friends started distancing herself. We didn't get in a fight and she seemed very accepting when I told her I was gay. We used to get lunch together, go shopping, and have regular sleepovers but once I was out, all of that stopped. After making plans and having them fall through over and over, I finally asked her what the issue was. Her response soon became a sentence I would here way too often: "I don't want you to start liking me like that."

I was shocked. I explained to her that our relationship was strictly friendly and that through the years of me coming to terms with who I was, I never once had feelings for her. But her uneducated, ignorant mind was made. And I lost a friend that day.

"I don't want to sleep in the same bed when we have sleepovers."

"My boyfriend doesn't want me hanging out with you."

"I don't want to change in front of you anymore."

"I'm scared you'll develop a crush on me."

"I don't like girls. You know that, right?"

These are just some examples of the reasons my friends have chosen to de-friend me. They were worried I would "fall" for them all of a sudden, not knowing that I had been a lesbian the entire time we were friends. Not knowing that I never had and never planned on staring that them while they changed. Not knowing that just because someone is gay, doesn't mean they are attracted to every member of the same sex. Not knowing that my now public sexuality changes absolutely nothing about our friendship and more importantly, who I am as a person.

I am a lesbian. I am a girl who likes girls. Am I girl who likes every girl I see? Of course not. If I was straight, you wouldn't assume that I liked every male I came in contact with. Do I stare at every pair of boobs that come my way? Definitely not. Is it hard for me to control myself when I have sleepovers with my friends that are girls? No! My sexuality has nothing to do with my ability to control myself. You don't see straight girls jumping every boy that walks in the room.

The mindset of my "ex" friends is the same mindset that people have when they say LGBT+ couples shouldn't have or adopt kids. It is the same mindset of those who believe transgendered individuals are pedophiles and rapists. It is the same mindset of those who believe that being LGBT+ automatically diminishes your character and morals. It is hurtful, stereotypical, ignorant, and wrong. And it is sad that I lost friends over who I chose to love.

Report this Content
New Year Resolutions

It's 2024! You drank champagne, you wore funny glasses, and you watched the ball drop as you sang the night away with your best friends and family. What comes next you may ask? Sadly you will have to return to the real world full of work and school and paying bills. "Ah! But I have my New Year's Resolutions!"- you may say. But most of them are 100% complete cliches that you won't hold on to. Here is a list of those things you hear all around the world.

Keep Reading...Show less

The Ultimate Birthday: Unveiling the Perfect Day to Celebrate!

Let's be real, the day your birthday falls on could really make or break it.

​different color birthday candles on a cake
Blacksburg Children's Museum

You heard it here first: birthdays in college are some of the best days of your four years. For one day annually, you get to forget about your identity as a stressed, broke, and overworked student, and take the time to celebrate. You can throw your responsibilities for a day, use your one skip in that class you hate, receive kind cards and gifts from loved ones and just enjoy yourself.

Keep Reading...Show less

Unleash Inspiration: 15 Relatable Disney Lyrics!

Leave it to Disney to write lyrics that kids of all ages can relate to.

The 15 most inspiring Disney songs

Disney songs are some of the most relatable and inspiring songs not only because of the lovable characters who sing them, but also because of their well-written song lyrics. While some lyrics make more sense with knowledge of the movie's story line that they were written for, other Disney lyrics are very relatable and inspiring for any listener.

Keep Reading...Show less

The Six Most Iconic Pitbull Lyrics Of All Time

Mr. Worldwide just wants to see you succeed.

a photo of artist Pitbull

It is no secret that Pitbull is a gifted artist, but many fail to remember that he can be a source of great inspiration as well. The following is a list of iconic Pitbull lyrics that we know and love. Read on to feel empowered — if you think you can handle it.

Keep Reading...Show less

11 Essential Expectations for Becoming the Ultimate Cheermeister

Mastering Festive Expectations: Tips to Shine as Your Holiday Cheermeister

Crazy for Christmas

So you’ve elected yourself as this year's Holiday Cheermeister, there’s no shame in that. The holidays are your pride and joy, and you've taken on the responsibility to get everyone in the spirit. With only one week until Christmas, here are some things we expect from you, Cheermeister.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments