You live your whole life trying to live up to everyone's expectations, and not just expectations of you, but of whoever they may need at the time. A friend who is blunt, persistent and always there, a girlfriend who is loyal, pushes you to be all that you can be or even an enemy to release their anger on. You are always there for whoever, whenever and to be whatever they need you to be, at the time, but once their life is back in order and they don't need you anymore then you're left alone, again.
This is the true meaning of being someone who is there no matter what through every tear, heartbreak, and spurt of loneliness. You've been "included" in so many friend groups it's hard to remember at this point, you've put yourself out there hundreds of times to be a friend for someone who never cared what you had to say, they just needed someone to listen because the someone they wanted was unavailable. You feel included, for a short amount of time then again, you're the girl who looks like she's trying too hard to be someone people want in their life.
You think you're being confided in and that, for once, you mean something but when it comes down to it you were just someone to fill that never-ending void. You give all that you have, for a long time but finally, you've given all that you have left and there is no more to give. You are so worn out, so sick and absolutely tired of being nothing but a waste in everyone's life. You'll hear things like "we love you", "how dare you feel this way?" but the truth is, they've made you feel this way and another truth is, it's not their fault. It's no one's fault, you're just not a girl who is necessarily important enough to want or need, they don't even realize they treat you the way they do because you're just not important enough to matter.
After constant years of being left out, being lesser than and never amounting to be what a single person NEEDS me to be, I've realized that you have to be who you need you to be. This entire article was mostly a sob fest, pity party that seemed as if there were no outcome but there is, and that outcome is that no matter who you have, or don't have, you always have you and you are always enough because after years of being alone, who has always been there to pick you back up? You. You've never given up on yourself. Stop allowing yourself to feel so beneath everyone because you are underappreciated because you are amazing. You're the friend who is blunt, persistent and always there; you are the girlfriend who is loyal and pushes them to be the best them that they can be, and you're even sometimes an enemy to a person who needs to release anger. Although nobody realizes it, you are reliable, trustworthy and someone to always confide in so even if you don't have anyone there to be that for you, you always have YOU so you are never alone!
