In a forest, a lake, just us. And I said "Yes." For me, the most magical proposal ever. And he, the most wonderful man on this planet. We were in love, we couldn't stop smiling and we had goosebumps all day long. And we still have.
But something changed.
After making the decision to spend the rest of our lives together, my fiancé and I were completely lost in the so-called honeymoon phase. We were inseparable, unapologetic in our infatuation, crazy for each other.
We immediately started to plan the wedding. Nature, a small church, a short guest list. Every detail added to the beauty of our love bubble and often we simply stared lovingly in each other's eyes and couldn't believe that we're about to spend the rest of our lives together.
Wedding bands, flowers, the menu. The hotel, wedding dance, and invitations. The church, the photographers, the dress. I was in heaven. He was, too. Every step we made took us closer to that day we will promise to care for each other. Forever.
And you simply cannot wait for that day to come.
Then, suddenly, it's only a month left. A month is left for all those things you planned for over a year to happen. There is only a month left to see those flowers you spent zillion hours on choosing. Or the wedding bands to put on you're so in love with. Or to see all those guests you invited to share that moment with.
And suddenly you swallow, you take a deep breath and you realize that actually, you are nervous, tensed and freaking out a little bit. You're asking why? Well, because there is not a lot left from the easy-going, relaxed, nature-based wedding you had in mind twelve months ago. Let me tell you: the more you learn about planning a wedding, the more details suddenly appear, the more things there are to do, and somehow even the guest list turns out to be gigantic. Now, you see that it's not only the wedding ceremony you totally look forward to. It's also an event you organize and will be judged for.
Maybe, there is nothing wrong with that either. Maybe it's just me. I don't like pressure. And as it happens, the bigger the event, the more pressure there is. Don't get me wrong, I still love everything we did. Actually, I'm even more in love with the way that got us there than with the result we'll see in a month. Being in that complete love bubble, however, made me forget that tiny detail of stage fright, pressure and lack of self-confidence that sometimes haunts me. And now, when there's only a month left, those feelings slowly appear.
Will everything turn out as we wish it to? Will our guests like the food? Or maybe they won't like the music? Will I be able to dance in my dress? What if…. So many things swiveling through my head. So many questions.
There is one thing left, though. Him. He is still the same. He is even more wonderful. And I feel even safer. Who cares about the flowers, or caterer, or the weather. It's going to be us, right? So let's not freak out. Let's be simply crazy for each other – that's what we do best.