I was catching up with my cousin (who also doubles as one of my very best friends) the other night, and while we were talking about all things dating and about how confusing men can be these days. I started thinking about all the bizarre things that men - nay, boys - can pull to make you go absolutely crazy. Thankfully, I'm in a loving, stable relationship and don't have to worry about getting my hopes up or being let down. But, it got me thinking about all the lame excuses that I've gotten in the past. I guess you truly have to just deal with the ugly before you can deal with the good.
It's seriously so funny now to commemorate past relationships now and how funny it is now. Between my friends and me, we've gotten it all. While there are truly just too many grand excuses to count, here are my top three favorite excuses that I've gotten to get out of a relationship.
"I just need some time to work on myself."
Let me preface - I'm all about self care and self love, and I'm not saying his feelings were invalid. But, what 20 year old frat guy with a border line drinking problem is going to break up with you because they need time for themselves? I mean, maybe. But, let's be honest with ourselves - he's just not that in to you.
"I'm sorry, I just wanna be able to have time for my friends and my XBox."
I simply can't make this up. Can I even be mad? At least he was somewhat honest about why he wanted to end things. The only thing that irks me is that I didn't get to end it first.
There are just not enough things to say about this. There are not enough words in the world to describe my intense passionate hate for xbox. Or gaming in general. Why can't girls have something that is equivalent to xbox?
"I can't get over my ex wife"
Yes, ladies. This is true, and my very favorite one. My freshman year in college I was dating this guy that I met through a mutual friend. My first college relationship if you will. Just when he met my family and it was getting comfortable, I was hit with that break up text. Later, I find out that he just has never been ready for a relationship since his wife left. (I was 19 years old and had already dated someone divorced.) You can imagine my complete and utter SHOCK when I found out he got married...... at 17..... in high school. This man also had a pig as a pet. The end.
