The Frustrations Of Being In A Mix Of My 20's, Dating And Technology

For those of you have been there, going through this, or will be going through this, let's be frustrated together. When you mix trying to figure out what you want to do with your life, boys, and huge advancements in technology your life can get pretty hectic. Dating is eventful enough, but add in some social media and your life can get real crazy. Oh, then you can add in transitioning into adulthood/ college/ new jobs...honestly it becomes, for lack of a better word a "shit show." But the positive is that you learn from this mess and it can lead to some very funny stories.

So let's start at the beginning, our 20's. I've been in my 20's for all of five minutes and already am freaked out. Upperclassmen, figuring out what you want to after college, slowly relying less on your parents, beginning new jobs, and just realizing your kind of like a real life adult. It sounds wild. It is confusing, everything is so new and scary. You are making new friends and getting farther away from the old ones. Your family makes memories without you. It is a lot to handle.

Then lets throw dating into the mix. You are meeting great people, not so great people. Figuring out log distance, summer flings, break ups, make ups, and hook ups. It is a lot to deal with. Half your friends have been dating their boyfriend for over 20 months and the other half of your friends have hooked up with over 20 guys. As soon as you want a relationship, you can never find the right guy and as soon as you really enjoy the single life you get tied down. Life is messy and dating doesn't help. You get nervous, dating is much of a thing now-a-days so you don't know how to even go on a date. There are people who will never make the first move and then others who will never stop making moves. Some of your friends met their boyfriend in class, or met their girlfriend at a party. Sometimes you can be trying so hard to meet more people that you don't appreciate the moment. Let things happen naturally and have fun with your friends.

Now, for the cherry on top, internet. Online dating, having a media presence, presenting yourself on social media just adds to the craziness. Tinder is a place to meet people but it is known for it's hookup presence on the app. Then let's say you meet someone from online, Catfish is a very real thing. Be careful. Do your research. Go with your gut. If something doesn't feel right, it probably isn't. Then there's just dating a guy in this technological age. We literally have the option to know what a person is doing 24/7. People check into places on Facebook, see what fun things your new boo has been up to on Instagram, what they are thinking about on twitter, see their everyday life on Snapchat, and now with Apple's app "Find My Friends" you can legit track their moves. All that power is scary. People used to date in person, and only talked on the home phone. Technology encourages the codependency on each other because you can virtually be with another person all day. Between instant messaging and social media you can never leave a person's side. If your a jealous person or do not trust much, social media can be a real problem in relationships. Not to mention, as we grow up we have to learn how we want to represent ourselves. You can't post party pictures because then people won't hire you, you want to look professional but also want your friends from high school to know you are still fun. You need the best selfie so that your Tinder profile is fire. It's so much to deal with.

So my advice for dealing with all this is simple, much unlike my life: Figure yourself out first, do what you like, have fun with your friends, appreciate the moment, and the rest will fall into place. "Rome wasn't built in one day." and life is crazy so take your time and breathe.