When you move off to college or even just anywhere away from home it can be intimidating. My parents are one of the most important people in my life. I absolutely adore and admire them. It breaks my heart to be apart from them in distance. I am already an independent person so I never thought I really had to depend on them. My first two months away from them, I lived by myself.
During this time I realized that I was, in fact, dependent on my parents. They were the ones that when I came home, they could tell if I was having a bad day. They know me like the back of their hand and it’s hard for me to pretend everything is okay on my bad days without them calling me out. By yourself, you don't have that luxury. They were the ones that I could rant to or could seek for advice. You have to re-evaluate your free time when you are alone.
I knew being away from them, I would need to seek God more than normal. I believe you can always seek God more than what you currently do. This season in my life gave me a greater opportunity to do that. All of the downtime I normally would have talking to my parents at night quickly became my time with God.
Although I admire and appreciate my parents, they don't even compare to my God.
Moving away has granted me the blessing to seek God above everything. I never knew how much I depended on my parents until I moved away. In other words, I never knew how much I didn't depend on God for until I moved off. It is crazy that when you think your relationship with God is a 9/10, He then takes you to a 20/10. God will always amaze me.
Although I was away from my “earthly home,” I was never away from my Heavenly home. Home is wherever I am with Him. Keep this in mind when you move off or when Jesus leads you somewhere new and out of your comfort zone. Jesus is always there. I honestly believe everyone should (when the timing is right) move off on their own because that’s when you have to experience a new dependence on God. I am forever thankful for the move, my parents, and the One that makes everywhere feel like home.
So Jesus, thank you for allowing me to love you. Thank you for choosing me to be the one that gets to love you. Thank you for being my friend, father, savior, healer, deliverer, peacemaker, provider, and my absolute everything. Thank you for loving the real, raw me. I am so overwhelmed at your faithfulness and patience. You are my forever home.
When I fell into temptation, You embraced me with love. When my dad left, You were there. When I felt alone, Your overwhelming presence consumed me. When I wanted to walk out on my calling, You captured me with grace. When I failed a test, You reminded me of Your plans. When friends were no longer friends, You spoke life into me. When You called loved ones home, You gave me peace. When depression kicked in, You brought healing. When I was rejected for the sake of your name, You gave joy.
You were there.
You are here now.
Therefore, I know that You will always be.
-B
