Trigger warning: this piece contains themes of self-harm, suicide, and alcoholism.


I was born in a hospital

psych ward at age 10.

Signed my own birth certificate-

suicide note & sent it in as an

assignment to my teacher.


I was baptized by a priestly

hunting knife at 16.

Soaked in the holy water

of my own veins. The first

of many times it would

consecrate me.


I received first communion

at 18. Drank the blood

of a man who also knew suffering.

It turned me vampiric at first taste.

Offered me salvation

in times of sorrow.


I died at 20.

Turned atheist.

Crucified my demons.

Killed my darlings.

Poisoned them all

with antidepressants.