kindred spirit

A Poem For a Kindred Spirit

"I hope the exit is joyful, and I hope never to return."

- Frida Kahlo


frida kahlo once wrote

in a letter to diego rivera,

"i am left knowing that I love you

more than my own skin.

and though you may not love me as much,

you do love me a little, don't you?

if this is not true, i will always be hopeful that it could be."

my cracked marble pythoness

felt her agonies as a fire in her belly

stoked by infidelity and acid rain tragedy

carried her canvases on broken back and sagging shoulders

to each clandestine corner of her hollow chest

spent years searing masterpieces onto the back of her hands--

she was her own greatest work.

loved and misused by a man who was no sooner monogamous

than he was of godlike sentiment

larger than olympus, withered under her calloused palms

she did not get to feel his remorse soak through her aching bones

i do not think she would have wanted to;

frida was too ferocious a woman to let the fumbling speech of a guilty man

force her hand to forgiveness.

diego's final remark after frida's passing was,

"july 13, 1954 was the most tragic day of my life.

i had lost my beloved frida forever.

too late now i realized that

the most wonderful part of my life

had been my love

for frida."

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To The Parent Who Chose Addiction

Thank you for giving me a stronger bond with our family.


When I was younger I resented you, I hated every ounce of you, and I used to question why God would give me a parent like you. Not now. Now I see the beauty and the blessings behind having an addict for a parent. If you're reading this, it isn't meant to hurt you, but rather to thank you.

Thank you for choosing your addiction over me.

Throughout my life, you have always chosen the addiction over my programs, my swim meets or even a simple movie night. You joke about it now or act as if I never questioned if you would wake up the next morning from your pill and alcohol-induced sleep, but I thank you for this. I thank you because I gained a relationship with God. The amount of time I spent praying for you strengthened our relationship in ways I could never explain.

SEE ALSO: They're Not Junkies, You're Just Uneducated

Thank you for giving me a stronger bond with our family.

The amount of hurt and disappointment our family has gone through has brought us closer together. I have a relationship with Nanny and Pop that would never be as strong as it is today if you had been in the picture from day one. That in itself is a blessing.

Thank you for showing me how to love.

From your absence, I have learned how to love unconditionally. I want you to know that even though you weren't here, I love you most of all. No matter the amount of heartbreak, tears, and pain I've felt, you will always be my greatest love.

Thank you for making me strong.

Thank you for leaving and for showing me how to be independent. From you, I have learned that I do not need anyone else to prove to me that I am worthy of being loved. From you, I have learned that life is always hard, but you shouldn't give into the things that make you feel good for a short while, but should search for the real happiness in life.

Most of all, thank you for showing me how to turn my hurt into motivation.

I have learned that the cycle of addiction is not something that will continue into my life. You have hurt me more than anyone, but through that hurt, I have pushed myself to become the best version of myself.

Thank you for choosing the addiction over me because you've made me stronger, wiser, and loving than I ever could've been before.

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