To my pride and joy,

Pharaoh. I wish you could understand this. You lie next to me, with your radar ears searching for the smallest hint of sound. The way they capture noise and even voices from China is quite amazing.

When daddy brought you home, I’d never held such a tiny puppy. I never considered that I would feel like a mother to you. I cry as I write this because I can’t even fathom being without you. I don’t know what I would do if I came home one day and you weren’t there to greet me. To give me those soggy, wet kisses. To yawn and almost speak to me. God, the love I feel for you is beyond my understanding. You’re not my biological son, hell, not even the same species, but you are mine. Forever and always.

You taught me how to be patient. I truly didn’t understand what patience was until I met you in my arms. It was almost Christmas. I didn’t know you would be my gift. Daddy said to close my eyes and hold out my arms. I was confused when I felt little paws on me, but nevertheless, I opened them and there you were, sweetie. So small. So delicate. I was frightened by the amount of responsibility that you were going to be. You were and still are so expensive. I wasn't prepared. So, I didn’t want you and I’m sorry my love. I’m so sorry for not loving you right away. I’m sorry for making you wait months to feel this intense affection. I’m sorry for being so hard on you. I didn’t know. But just so you know, you're worth more than every penny.

It took me so long to get used to you, to the idea of sort of being a parent. I wanted to party and go out without worrying about coming home to check on a dog. But you weren’t just a dog or some animal. You were never a burden. You were the greatest gift I could have received. I just didn’t know it yet.

I look at you now and how much you’ve grown and I can’t believe my eyes. You’re even more precious now than you were when you were a baby. You have this fierce attitude when you want to eat dinner and I tease you because you make me laugh so much. You look at me with these big brown eyes and my heart melts every damn time.

Mommy doesn’t have a lot of time to play because of school and work and laziness, but I promise to make time for you. I vow it. I swear it. I can’t imagine my life without you. I’ve probably repeated that, but I don’t care.

I remember the first time you pooped in the house. I didn’t get mad right away, but I ended up being furious because I clean all the time, like every day. So, seeing a big doodoo on the carpet made mommy super angry. Now, you potty outside and you’re a good boy. Who’s a good boy? That’s right, you are.

You have to know you look like an angel when you’re sleeping. Because that’s when you’re not barking. Every sound, every doorbell, every knock on the door ignites the barking. I don’t know why but I’m glad that you let us know who’s at the door. Thank you. I’m not sure why you don’t like the sound of bicycles either, but I’m going to need you to get used to it because I was thinking of buying one someday and taking you for a ride with me in the little basket.

I’m sure you’d prefer the car rides instead, huh? That’s okay, I like car rides with you, too. I love going on walks with you on sunny days and letting the wind blow through our hair. I love your walk, you’ve got swag boy. Your booty moves like you’re on a runway and it’s hilarious. Thank you, sweet boy, for all the times you’ve guarded me and kept me safe while I do number 2. Thank you for being there for me on my hardest days, where I come home with a swollen face from a river of tears falling down it. Thanks for licking those off because at least, you’re hydrated. With salt.

Thank you for being my ears when I felt like no one else listened to my cries.

I love massaging your big ears because I know you love it. You make this face where your eyes get small and calm and your eyes start to tilt back because it feels good. Don’t even get me started on those belly rubs. I love everything about you, even the constant barking. It’s not cool when mommy’s trying to do homework, but otherwise, bark on.

Oh papito, you’ve made me better just by being in my life and I wanted to say thank you for being alive, my son. My pride and joy. My light. You’re what every person needs. A dog who loves and greets you at the door with an over joyous tail wag.

My sweet Egyptian prince, I love you will all my heart. Thank you for being my friend.

Love,

Janice aka Mommy