I’ve been told that confidence isn’t about being liked by everyone, it’s about being okay when you’re not. It’s about being okay when you fail because you’re confident in your ability to bounce back. This resilience has been the most valuable skill I've learned as a college student and it’s absolutely essential to success in all facets of life.
Confidence Is preached at people as though it’s the single most important key unlocking the door to success, but how can one be confident without having resilience? Challenges are an inevitable part of everyday life, both professionally and personally. The key to success isn't simply how confident one is, it’s how one reacts when confronted with challenges. It’s resilience.
Often times, the most resilient people in the world are people who have faced major adversity and setbacks in their lives. Confident people are not some sort of superhuman species who experience no difficulty or distress, they just know how to deal with it. Just look at the success of people like Nelson Mandela, Oprah Winfrey, and Stephen Hawking. They used their hardships as motivation to push forward and become some of the most successful people in history.
The good news is that resilience is not some inherent trait that some people seem to have while others don’t. Resilience can be learned and developed in anyone. Become mindful of your behaviors, actions, and thoughts in times of adversity and success will come knocking at your door.
1. Surround yourself with those who love you
The sky is the limit when you surround yourself with people who lift you up. You don’t have to take on the world on all by yourself. Accept help from those who care about you.
2. Stop making mountains out of molehills
Life has a way of sneaking up on us when we least expect it. You can’t change the fact that hardships are inevitable, but you can change how you process and respond to them. Try stepping out of your current frame of reference. A problem may seem insurmountable now, but will it really matter in a month, a year? Think about it.
3. Change in life is inevitable, accept it
Spending all of your time and energy on a circumstance that will never change is not only a waste of time, it prevents you from focusing on circumstances that you can change. I urge you to focus on what you have to gain, not what you have to give up.
4. Take baby steps
Rome wasn't built in a day. Set goals. Work towards them every day. Slowly you will have accomplished what you want without even realizing it. Do something every day that moves you in the direction that you want to go.
5. Don't say "why me," say "try me"
Don't waste your time wallowing in self-pity, waiting for others to save you. Snap out of it. Take the bull by the horns. You can run the day or the day can run you. Absolutely nothing changes when absolutely nothing is done.
6. Turn “I can’t” into “I can”
Believe in yourself. You are in control of your own life. There is a strength inside of you that is greater than any obstacle. You just have to use it.
7. See the glass half full
Don’t waste your time on negative thoughts. Cultivate a positive outlook on life. Dark thoughts cloud your mind's ability to recognize what’s important, while positivity opens your eyes to all that is possible.
8. Put yourself first
Do what is best for you. Your body is your temple, cherish it. Resilience requires a great deal of fortitude and strength. Take care of yourself so you are prepared to use it.
