So... this is week ___ (I have no clue I'm going insane and have lost all motivation) of quarantine and there are a few things that I think we need to discuss. A certain few people have managed to make their mark during this COVID season and I am not surprised. Would it even be a global pandemic if we didn't have a few of those cringe-worthy moments?
Welcome to my TedRant™.
The Social "Social" Distancers
This is number one for a reason, the one good thing about this quarantine is that there's no FOMO because its something EVERYONE SHOULD BE DOING. But of course, we have our social try-hards that want to post their sickly kick-back-sesh only on their Snapchat stories so their moms can't get on their ass for it.
People Making Money Off the Pandemic
This one REALLY grinds my gears, various corporations have begun advertising masks with no mention of charitable donation, they're humbly making money off of our safety and wellbeing, fun right?
You know why.
Any Group Of Celebrities Singing Together
Gal Gadot sweetie, the thought was there it really was. But I don't think at the time us normal folk were too busy trying not to die than wanting to watch wonder women and the rest of the millionaires sing Imagine off-tune.
Throwback Traveling Instagramers
"The wish I was there" posts are really, really been there done that, literally. Everyone wishes they were somewhere else too, not just you. Did you just want to show off the fact that you went to Bali in 2017? take a seat.
Billionaires Complaining about Quarantine
As I sip on my boxed wine sangria and eat Annie's mac n' cheese out of my lap scrolling through my Instagram stories the last thing I want to do is listen to celebrities complain about how they are stuck summering at their Malibu beach-side villa as they sip Postmated martinis by their infinity pool.
That One Ex that Texts You Every time You're Back Home
That classic "you back home for the summer?" text has morphed into the "hey how are you and your family doing during this time?" text. Ahhh, the sweet taste of yesteryear, a bit bitter huh?
Buying 700 rolls of toilet paper I'm sure is very beneficial to you and your only child, but before your next reach for all that TP think of poor old, frail Eugene who ventured to the grocery store with a promise to his wife Hilda that he would return home with a 2 pack Charmin Ultra Strong to last them the year.
People That Have Claimed Sobriety
I hate you, but applaud you at the same time.
I can't get Cardi B yelling CORONA VIRUS at us out of my head, please help.