Yes, I'm Short, But Please Don't Use Me As An Armrest | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

Yes, I'm Short, But Please Don't Use Me As An Armrest

Would the ladies under 5'4 please stand up. (No really, please stand, I can't see you, I am also under 5'4.)

209
Yes, I'm Short, But Please Don't Use Me As An Armrest
Jessica Prowell

I just wanna start out by saying it's not fair. I always have to stand in front in group photos, I can never see behind anyone during movies/plays/concerts even when they're SITTING. Fun fact: I have been measured at the doctor's office 3 times, each time it's been shorter. I started out at 5'4 and made my way down to 5'2 1/2. My dad was like 6'2, my brother is also 6'2, and my mom is 5'7. I didn't think I was supposed to shrink until I became, like, an adultier adult so SOMEONE IS LYING HERE. PLEASE LET ME BE TALL/5'4/NORMAL SIZED.

PSA: if you're over 5'10, DON'T SIT IN FRONT OF SOMEONE UNDER 5'4 IF YOU CAN HELP IT. SWITCH WITH SOMEONE FOR THE LOVE OF MY SANITY AND VIEW. I JUST WANNA WATCH MAMMA MIA 2 FOR THE 5TH TIME IN THEATERS IN PEACE.

I know it's also not your fault that you're tall. I get it; I really do, but you have a lot more advantages here than we do. Do us a solid and listen up.

1. If we ask for help reaching something, please don't laugh

Giphy

When I was little, and by little I mean I still do this, I literally have to hoist myself onto the kitchen counter, sometimes stand up on it, just to reach the top shelf. I can never ever reach the top shelves of Walmart, ESPECIALLY BECAUSE THEY STARTED ADDING THINGS TO THE TIPPY TOP ONLY TALL PEOPLE AND LADDERS CAN REACH. DISCRIMINATION.

2. Wearing heels isn't always the answer

Giphy

I trip over my own feet no matter what's on my feet, even if I'm barefoot. Telling me to wear heels is asking me to fall in my face anytime there's the smallest amount of texture on the ground or if I use stairs. They hurt my feet anyway and only make me a relatively normal height. 10/10 do not recommend.

3. Hugging us is not as awkward for us as it is for you

Giphy

Being hugged as a short person by anyone taller (not a huge standard) is the best thing ever TBH. I don't know if it's only me who loves it, but your entire body is just enveloped by another person showing you affection. IT'S SO SWEET AND I LOVE IT. 1000/10 definitely recommend. Go hug a shorty, we always need hugs.

4. We're easy to lose, be careful

Giphy

See, being easy to lose in a crowd/store/anywhere is a win/lose. Sometimes it's a win for us because #socialanxiety so we don't have to deal with people but it's also a lose for us because #socialanxiety (I'm struggling). I get kinda freaked out when I lose my friends in a crowd because I can't see above anyone to look for them. Lots of random marco/polo games happen in Target.

5. We know we're short, we don't need a reminder

Giphy

"Haha, you're so small, it's adorable!"

IT'S REALLY NOT. I mean, it definitely is, but IT'S REALLY NOT FOR THE 10000000TH TIME IN MY LIFE. I lowkey love being short but also highkey hate it BECAUSE I get called adorable.

"You can't be scary, you're too cute!"

AM I?????? GEE, I DIDN'T KNOW. THANKS.

TL;DR -

Yes, I have short legs.

No, you cannot use my head/shoulders as an armrest unless I love you.

Yes, I need you to lift me so I can see what's happening.

No, I will not tie your shoes because I'm closer to the ground.

Yes, coffee most definitely stunted my growth.

Short people have feelings too.

Respect us.

We're closer to the ground so we're closer to Satan.

( Twas only a jest)



media2.giphy.com

*Me, skipping away from kicking you in the shins when you make fun of my shortness*

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

600
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

447143
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

20335
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Moana's Top 10 Life Tips

"Moana" is filled with life lessons that involve far more than finding true love as many other Disney movies do.

43655
Animated image of a woman with long dark hair and tattoos
StableDiffusion

1. It's easy to be fooled by shiny things.

Digital image of shiny gemstones in cased in gold. shiny things StableDiffusion

Tamatoa created a liar filled with shiny things simply for the purpose of tricking fish to enter and become his food. He too experiences a lesson in how easy it is to be tricked by shiny things when Moana distracts him by covering herself in glowing algae so Maui can grab his hook.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments