Religion Is No Longer Apart Of My Life

Religion Is No Longer Apart Of My Life

I do not assume any justification on who is right or wrong and I do not discriminate between beliefs as I was raised to, mainly because having grown up around all different belief systems and ideals


I believe and have faith in something greater than myself. I just do not give it a name beside the Universe, the Creator, a Higher Power, or the Source. I am more spiritual but have more so of a cocktail of beliefs from different beliefs I've learned and experienced. I do not assume any justification on who is right or wrong and I do not discriminate between beliefs as I was raised to, mainly because having grown up around all different belief systems and ideals. I have grown to realize that everyone agrees on the same things: love everyone unconditionally, remove those things that do not serve you, have faith in the source and just be a good fucking person!

At the end of the day, when the shit hits the fan and the world flips on its stomach, everyone will be praying anyway- FOR THE SAME OUTCOME! Even those who do not believe prayer of any kind works, they're gonna be like "please let this end!" To whom they're speaking- everyone has a name for it or a face or image they go to, or even carry with them. Every belief has a physical manifestation of whom they're speaking to- built up from having faith and love.

Guess what? I don't. I do not give the source a face because I believe the source is whatever I want it to be in the moment I need. And I am content with not having anyone image but many. I was raised to see a nigga with holes in his hands and feet spewing with humanitarianism but I changed to see a black woman full breasted, the color of caramel, and fruitful in every way then my image became like stars and energy waves flowing in I just am.

And this all teaches me to respect other beliefs both spiritual and religious. I understand growing up Baptist that Christians can only do what they've been taught is all they can do- "do what you can until you can't thanklessly then let go, let God, and pray." "Imma pray for you/Can I pray for you?" But plot twist... every belief does the same thing. The only differences are how prayer and worship are presented and executed. I'm just like meh, why trip? Why reject other beliefs because and only because I do not believe the same? I personally take the time to hear and give those with different beliefs to share with me. I would much rather give a safe space, or safer space, to share.

And with this, I do not take in with intent to convert or challenge but why keep someone from exercising what they've been taught, or attempt to change what they trust and believe as their own personal truth. I never understood how people can be that blinded and unsympathetic towards others. And for what? What does it prove to tell someone their beliefs are wrong? Why are their beliefs wrong and yours are not? I never understood this about religion in general.

I feel it is wrong to try to convert without consent. If I am not asking you to help me believe what you believe, please do not try and make me or tell me I "need to" or "should" or stop me from converting because "it isn't right". Who are you to judge someone else's decisions about what they believe? Why is that your business? If it does not affect you directly, shut the fuck up! And this is not a slight against Christians, nor Muslims nor Jews nor Buddhists nor any other religion or spiritual belief- no.

This is what I believe about religion, and why it is unimportant to me to force others or scare people into the same bind.

The root of religion is a Latin word Religare which means to bind. Why would I desire to confine my thoughts, my actions, myself to one belief? Why should I try when it doesn't make sense to. How am I supposed to find comfort in something or someone because someone else told me that is what I should do? Do I not have a choice in the matter? My parents would say no and that it is my duty as a "good Christian" to abide by the laws God set in place (which is not a fact...I can read) and spread to other people the "good word". Now, what does frustrate me is that there is written evidence of the spread of Christianity causing the total demise of entire civilizations- whole nations, including my own ancestors- and I know those who choose to be ignorant to that fact.

No, this is not something I would ever want to believe in, put my trust and faith in, or ever spread around. I do not see good in religion. I see good in people who act and are decent fucking people who allow themselves to sit back and not control other people and prevent them from also being decent fucking people. But that is also a choice.

Everything in life is a choice. The only thing that isn't is existing. Living and breathing- you. are. here. Live your life and let go. Be free. I do not see the point in confining to one belief when there are so many that all say the same things as yours. I do not like that life has been brought to us as a factor that needs control in every aspect. Life continues with or without you. Why try to control what just is? I make and made MY choice to not confine my mind and body to one belief. That's idiotic and frankly lazy in my mind.

However, I do know people who do believe in one belief and are not closed minded to the idea of sharing beliefs across the board. For example, they believe in Christianity but not all of it. Instead, they stem their belief system from teachings in the Quran, and maybe a more Eastern belief, while also practicing shamanistic rituals. And they are decent fucking people who live their life. Questions are asked with an open mind and they're answered without conflict of interests. This is how one grows and gains a wealth of knowledge. Sharing ideas and flowing freely between them is how communication and love and how to simply be a decent fucking person.


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Christian Boys Vs. Godly Men

It is time to stop settling for the lesser of the two.

Ladies, there is a huge difference between a Christian boy and a Godly man; therefore, it is time to stop settling for the lesser of the two.

So many times I hear girls saying:

“Well, he’s a Christian.”

“He goes to church with me.”

“He listens to Christian music.”

“He went to church camp.”

“He has a favorite bible verse.”

SEE ALSO: What An Attractive Man Looks Like

Well, all of those things are just peachy and there is nothing wrong with doing those things. I mean, they’re all good things to do. But how is his personal relationship with God? How is his prayer life? Does he talk about his relationship with God, with you? Is he truly a follower of the one true God in all aspects of his life? These are some of the characteristics you should be looking for that makes a Godly man.

Ladies, a man will love you great when he loves God greater.

A Godly man will pursue an honest relationship with you. He will be clear of his intentions. A Godly man will worship, pray and passionately praise God with you. Whereas, a Christian boy might open the door for you, a Godly man will open his bible and explore God’s word with you so that you both may grow spiritually, together. While a Christian boy may put on an outward show, a Godly man will live out the love of Jesus daily.

So ladies, are you catching on to this ongoing trend? A Godly man does more because you deserve more.

A Godly man will be a leader. Trust me, I know that in today’s society Godly men are few and far between while Christian boys come in plenty. But you deserve a man who is after God’s heart not just a boy who goes to church. And I know that this Christian boy may seem great and have some really stellar qualities at the time but money and looks fade, whereas, an ongoing love for our savior will not.

The greatest thing a man can do for a woman is to lead her closer to God than himself. (Yes, yes, yes).

SEE ALSO: As Christians, Life Isn't Supposed To Be Hard

So I beg of you, do not settle. Do not settle just because you’re tired of being single, it’s convenient or because you want the relationship your friend has. Single does not equal available and a relationship status does not define you. God uses your season of singleness to prepare you for what is to come. And if you’re dating a Christian boy, he needs to step it up or you need to move on. Wait for a Godly man who is ready to lead you. God’s timing is always better, always. No matter the circumstance. So, do not rush God. (I mean, He is, after all, pretty good at His job). Therefore, turn your full focus to Him and He will direct your path.

“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matthew 6:33

Cover Image Credit: Christina Sharp

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If God Didn’t Intend For Women To Be Equals, Why Did She Make Us So Incredible?

Yeah, I said She.


An article that absolutely infuriates me has gone viral. As a feminist, as a writer, and simply as a woman, it drives me up a wall to see another woman proclaiming that God's plan for women was to "submit to their husbands."

I don't know where to start with all the issues I found in reading the piece, so I'll start with what a feminist is. It's a subjective term and its connotation varies from person to person.

But to me, feminism is being empowered and expressive individuals with open minds and open hearts. They are activists for change and equality. They have concerns about the environment and global warming. They acknowledge issues within sexism and racism and then try to figure out how to solve them. They see that the world isn't perfect.

Feminists are the reason we can vote. They're the reason birth control is an option for us. They're why we're allowed to wear pants. They're why we have careers. The female pioneers paved the way for anything we're allowed to do, and they are why we celebrate the power of women every March.

But instead, the woman who wrote "I'm A Christian And I'm Not A Feminist, Because God Did Not Intend For Women To Be Equals," used our month of pride for clout. And took justification from The Bible to do it.

The Bible is not an instruction manual. It was written over many, many years by hordes of sexist men whose existence we have minimal proof of. And over the last thousand years, it's been translated and reinterpreted more times than anyone could ever keep track of. That's not to say it doesn't have some good lessons, but lessons are all they are.

Thinking your worth and capabilities were planned for you thousands of years in advance is ignorant. Religion and The Bible and God are as subjective as feminism. Everything is open-ended. One person's view of who or what God is not going to be the same as the last.

Commonly, God is seen as a man at the center of the universe who holds all existence in his hands. He is the reason why anyone does anything. He is the rule maker. And He is judging us and waiting for our every mistake.

But as a proud feminist, I've chosen to have my own idea of this holy being. I wasn't brought up in church, but I decided to believe in something much greater than myself or anything I've ever seen just because I wanted to. I want to believe that faith has to come from somewhere, and I didn't want a book making the rules for me.

Just by watching life move through time, I happen to believe God is the good in all of us. Not one being, but he beginning and the end of everything. The push and the pull. The conscious and subconscious. And considering that God is the creator, I've concluded God must be a woman because women are the creators.

And in my experience, women have proved themselves to be much stronger and more capable than any man.

As for what She creates, I think She makes no mistakes. I think She tests our patience and beliefs by giving us what we don't expect. There's intent and love in everything She gives us. I think every woman was made to be relentless, imperfect, fearless, and even a little rebellious.

And if we're saying Adam and Eve were the start of it all, then God proved that right off the bat. God saved the best for last, and then made her a badass. Yes, the first woman came into this world as a rule breaker. She questioned authority. And since the beginning of time, authority has been a snake. The world is our forbidden fruit to bite.

The sole purpose of a woman isn't to submit to anyone. A woman can do whatever she damn well pleases, just as any man. A woman's worth isn't tied to what kind of wife or mother she is and how closely she follows the rules. I was raised by the most incredible mom and wife. She did happen to stay at home with me and be the traditional woman. But while she was home, she taught me how great it is to be a woman. She made sure I knew I could be whoever I wanted and would pay no consequences for that.

My parents didn't raise me in a church. And I never saw that as a flaw or lack of judgment. My southern home was like a church; full of faith and love. But on Sundays, we would sleep in and have a big breakfast at noon because we had too much fun staying up late Saturday night dancing around our living room to music. Whitney Houston, Dolly Parton, Shania Twain, and Madonna led the choir — singing about independence and the power of being empowered as women.

As a feminist, I will not judge those who haven't accepted all the honors of being female. I can just tell everyone how wonderful it is to stand for something. I can set an example so that more women will go forward.

And despite what anyone thinks of feminism, there's nothing exclusive about it. Feminists don't think they're any better than men, they just want the chance to prove their capabilities. It's so much bigger than thinking men suck. The truth is, we should have men at our side, not in front of or behind us. And not for romantic partnerships, but as allies. The best men are feminists too. We can make this walk alone, but there's power in numbers and in diversity.

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