I find it very difficult to do exactly what I want to do. Maybe it's because I don't know exactly what I want to do because I haven't encountered it yet. Or maybe it's because deep down what I know I want to do doesn't pay my bills or allow me to live a comfortable life. Or maybe it's because I need to find a way to make what I want to do profitable, but also purposeful.

I guess this is why people look for signs. But I don't want to be constantly looking for signs. I also worry that I may take occurrences as signs when in reality it was just a mere coincidence.

Conclusion: life is complex.

But, life is also beautiful. My emotions toward life have been varying a great deal lately. One minute I am feeling the beauty of it all and the next moment I am questioning everything. Life. I know it cannot be defined, but it can be purposeful and full of laughter and love. I do feel that when I think about my life, I think about the amazing people and moments that I am surrounded by. That is what matters to me most.

I am very much an optimist, but sometimes I just want some sort of validation. I guess never having validation is one of the consequences of constructing your life against the status quo and refusing to alter your life to fit society's rules.

We aren't raised to think about our purpose in life. It comes along later in life, once you are mature enough to hold deep, spiritual conversations, but also once you're able to see there is more to life. Your day to day doesn't define you. But your purpose does. Why do you do what you do? What is it you are hoping to achieve? Purpose is a simple word with a loaded meaning. If you take a step back for a moment, you could potentially realize that purpose is literally everything. It is why we live our lives a certain way. It is why we hold certain jobs. It is why we maintain specific relationships. It is why we push through the toughest of times. It is why we forgive the unforgivable acts. It is why we dream. It is why we breathe.

What is your purpose?