From the second we’re born, we begin to recognize emotions. A smile is happy. Frowns are sad. Eyes squeezed into thin slits accompanying a grimace are probably utter hatred. As I get older I grow more familiar with that one.

One word we are taught a little later is “depressed,” essentially meaning sadness. And if you’re part of today and aware of the world, you’ve probably heard of this crazy thing called “depression.” Only it’s not a crazy thing. It’s a reality for so many more people than we know. I used to think that depression was crazy. I thought it was a state of mind, caused by thinking, and that it could be changed by an adjustment in thinking. Even when my older brother claimed to have it and a doctor put him on medication for it, I thought it was insane! Just try being happy! As I switched from idiot to more aware, however, I realized something.

Depression was real. And depression was a part of me as well. To clarify, depression isn’t you feeling bad or even being a generally sad person! I’m happy a whole hecking lot. It’s a chemical imbalance in your brain that prevents you from maintaining your regular mindset and average way of thinking. It can cause you actual physical distress.

You might sit in your bed in the morning and feel unable to get up. Not lethargic and tired, you might feel like you would DIE if you simply left your bed. Taking a shower is an accomplishment. Going to your classes and doing work is an accomplishment. Making it through a day without sending your thoughts spiraling down is an ACCOMPLISHMENT.

And you know what makes it even harder? Old people.

I can hear my parents wondering what they did as if their actions caused it. It’s like having a broken leg, the cause isn’t important, making it not hurt like hell is. I can hear my grandparents too, saying that it’s just a bad attitude and I should fix it.

“In my day if we were depressed we were given a beating and told to be happy, and we did it!”

OK, grandpa, but gas also cost a nickel back then, you old fossil.

Times are changing, and people are too. Depression isn’t crying, or moping, or feeling miserable about your life. Depression is pain and so much more effort than anyone can possibly see. For anyone who doesn’t have depression, be kind. Listen, and try to understand. For anyone who does have it, keep fighting. There are more of us here than you know.