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9 Things to consider before rooming with your BFF in college

We're told that living with our best friends will be a complete disaster and we'll end up hating them and never speaking to them again but maybe there is a way to work around that fear and live with your bestie in perfect harmony.

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9 Things to consider before rooming with your BFF in college
Asia Richardson

When I first got to college, I didn't know my roommate at all. My roommate actually called me and seemed very nice so I was excited to meet her. Only after a semester of living together, we became really great friends. By the end of the year, we decided to live together the next school year. During that year we both started to recognize each other's flaws and what we didn't like about each other. By the third year, we didn't make it through a whole semester before I decided to move elsewhere. It might sound cool to room with your best friend in school but you might not know who they really are when you're only used to seeing them a few times a week. Here are some things to consider before rooming with your BFF in college:

Is this person a slob or super neat?

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Most people clean as much as they can when they have company over but it can be a whole different thing when you are living with this person. Do they like things neat and in order or do they throw things all over the place? Do they encourage you to keep your space clear or do they just not care? It's best to ask these questions before moving in.

How do they solve issues when they come up?

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You may need to reflect on your friendship and past disagreements. Ask yourself if your friend usually tries to resolve the problem as quickly and maturely as possible or do they become defensive right away? Do they listen to you and try to understand where you are coming from or do they run off to go tell your other friends how terrible you are? It is important to be able to resolve problems with your roommate so you can live together in peace.

Does this person enjoy a quiet space or a social space?

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You may want to discuss what atmosphere you both would like your space to be like. If you like it quiet but they like to bring their other friends around at different points of the day, you must come up with a compromise to deal with those differences.

Do they love the drama of gossip?

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You can tell a lot about someone who talks behind others backs with you. No one is perfect but you have to ask yourself if the things your friend says about others to you are just plain nasty. If they talk about others like that to you, chances are they do the same with others about you.

Is your friend a little judgy?

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I enjoy showing a little skin every now and again because that is my style, however, in my experience, my past roommate didn't always make me feel comfortable about my choices. I felt judged. As a best friend, you and your roommate should make each other feel confident about yourselves in your living space before heading out into the world where others aren't as pleasant.

What are their study habits?

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Based on your own study habits, it might be a good idea to ask your friend how they study. If you like a silent place to study but they like to blast their music, it's best to discuss ways to work around that like telling them to use head phones or you suggesting to study elsewhere if it isn't too much of a hassle.

Are they an early riser or do they sleep in?

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It's best to know when your friend likes to wake up so you both can work out a schedule for bathroom time. It's also important not to break the schedule. If you like to take up an hour and a half in the bathroom, it's probably a better idea to wake up much earlier than your roommate to avoid taking up their time.

Do they like to borrow your things often?

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It's nice to borrow things every now and again but in my experience, it gets to be a pain if you are being asked all the time. Like for instance, if you like to borrow your friend's finger nail polish remover often but have no intentions of replacing it, you're kind of a lame person. Don't be this person.

Does your friend like to decorate their living space?

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If you're like me, you don't like to decorate as much as others might so it can be a little frustrating when your friends bug you about your plain Jane side of the room. If your friend loves to decorate but you don't, try not to let them force you to do things you'd rather not do.

  • Obviously, not everyone has terrible experiences with living with their best friends but unfortunately, I did. I had to learn the hard way by becoming best friends with someone I didn't know beforehand and living with them for as long as I did. It's always good to reflect on experiences and learn from mistakes. Don't be afraid to ask your friend questions because it's better to ask them now then be miserable for a year.
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