Confessions Of A Twenty-First Century Girl

Confessions Of A Twenty-First Century Girl

times are different and so is life as a teenager

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Let's face it, every teenager has heard the phrase "well when I was a kid.....". Well, this is a public service announcement that is letting any mom, aunt, uncle, dad or any elder that times are very different and therefore, so is life for a teenager.

When our parents were teenagers, cell phones were around but, cellular data and social media did not exist. There was no Facebook or Instagram. They could not log onto tinder to find a match with a mere swipe left or right. Girls have always been mean and boys well they will always be boys, but handling them is now a whole different ball game.

As an 18-year-old, I have experienced heartbreak in my life. I fell in love with a boy who at sixteen I assumed would be my forever, very ironic I know. Most girls my age have experienced something close if not the same thing at least once in their life at this point. Yet, the hardest part of the breakup was not necessarily losing the sandy brown hair, green-eyed boy. It was trying to ignore the constant urge to text him at all hours of the day. I had to unfollow him on Instagram and Facebook and remove him as my friend on Snapchat because the sting of seeing him move on while I was suffering was too much to bare. My mom experienced her own teenage heartache too, but it was not near the same as mine. Yes, she did fall in love with a boy and yes he did break her heart. However, once the dead was done his face was not plastered all over her phone as a constant painful reminder of the person she had lost. She was allowed to move on in peace. The only reminder of the incident was having to hear the boys name called out during football games. It is harder to ignore a person when the smartphone you cannot go without is the one thing keeping the heartache fresh in your mind every time you open an app.

Now onto the dark hole that is, teenage girl drama. Every girl has experienced it, whether it was the best friend who turned out to be not so great or the very stereotypical popular cheerleader, or even from a jealous stranger over the internet. I will be the first to admit that I have been on both ends of the dramatic girl stick. I have been the girl crying in a dark room because of mean things said and sadly, I have been the girl saying mean things. It is a terrible thing to say, but I am not gonna act like I am a perfect child. I know I have said a million times to my own mother "mom things are different, we have social media now." Which in all fairness, we do have social media and although it is a blessing, it is also a curse. As time goes on I have found that the worst of snakes are the ones hiding in your own garden. We post things on Instagram for likes and if we don't get enough then the picture is deleted. Yet, with every post, there are those who comment loving things and there are the people who sit around and degrade everything about it. Face it, anyone who reads this knows they have done it at least once, and you're lying to yourself if you say you haven't. My mom always talks about the girls she experienced and how she handled them and her coin phrase is "just ignore them, it'll go away.'" No mom, they won't go away, They hide behind phone screens or sneak whispers in conversations until the whole school is talking about it. Ignoring them tends to make it worse because they just keep coming back for more. Our mothers did not have to worry about Instagram or Facebook drama, the only thing they had to worry about were peoples actual mouths and it is much easier to deal with a real person than someone's profile.

So yes, teenage girls experience the same thing as our mothers did when they were young, but the way that it is handled is so much different now, but the gentle hug and promises of a bright future are just as helpful now as they were many years ago.

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20 Rules Of A Southern Belle

It is more than just biscuits and grits.
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These unwritten rules separate the people that move to the South and were born and raised in the South. If you were born and raised in a small southern town, you either are a southern belle or hope you get to marry one. Their southern charm is hard to dislike and impossible to be taught.

1. Adults are to be answered with "Yes ma’am" and "Yes sir."

Whether it’s your parents, grandparents, or the person that checks you out at the grocery store, always say yes ma’am.

2. Always write a thank you note.

For any and everything. No gesture is too small.

3. Expect a gentleman to hold the door open and pull out your chair.

Chivalry is not dead; you just need to find the right guy.

4. All tea is sweet.

Below the Mason-Dixon Line, tea is made no other way.

5. Don’t be afraid to cook with butter.

I’ve never met a good cook that didn’t giggle a little.

6. “Coke” refers to all sodas.

Here in the south, this means all types of sodas.

7. Pearls go with anything — literally anything

And every southern belle is bound to have at least one good set.

8. "If it’s not moving, monogram it."

9. Pastels are always in fashion.

And they look good on almost everyone.

10. And so is Lilly Pulitzer.

11. Curls, curls and more curls.

The bigger the hair, the closer to Jesus.

12. If you are wearing sandals, your toenails should be done.

13. Never ever ever wear white shoes, pants, dresses, or purses after Labor Day or before Easter.

Brides are the only exception. Yes we actually do follow this rule.

14. Never leave the house without lipstick.

A little mascara and lipstick can work miracles.

15. Always wear white when you walk down the aisle.

Weddings are taken very seriously here in the South, and they should be nothing but traditional.

16. Southern weddings should always be big.

The more bridesmaids the better.

17. Saturdays in the fall are reserved for college football.

Whether you spend it tailgating in that college town or watching the big game from your living room. You can guarantee that all southerner’s eyes will be glued to the game.

18. Sunday is for Jesus and resting.

19. Learn how to take compliments curiously.

20. Have class, always.

Cover Image Credit: Daily Mail

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It's 2019, And I Can Confirm One Size Does Not Fit All, At All

I'll take feeling good over meeting your standards. Thank you.

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We live in a society where being yourself and expressing who you truly are is something that is becoming more and more accepted and is actually trendy. Left and right, people are coming forward and declaring who they are and want to be in life and there is a crowd of people there to cheer them on.

There is also always that small percent sitting in the corner, ready to throw derogatory comments and taint the self-love, respect, and acceptance that's flowing.

Every single time this happens, the internet breaks and feuds form in the comment sections. How many times does this fight have to be had before people just mind their own business? How someone looks is frankly none of your concern. Whether you think the person is too fat, too skinny, too girly, too rough, too whatever, it's none of your business.

I'm a firm believer that one should focus on their own life instead of living to tear others down. You should be more concerned with feeling good in your own body than wasting your energy trying to make people ashamed of theirs. It's not your place to comment on someone's appearance.

We should work on building up confidence and feeling good in our skin. Exercising, working on your mental health, and surrounding yourself with good energy will improve your life exponentially. DO NOT do this to achieve an aesthetic or try to look like an Instagram model. Only do it to feel good about yourself internally. What you look like on the outside should only matter to you.

I would be lying if I said I didn't fall victim to countless beautiful women who post their swimsuit photos looking like they stepped out of Vogue magazine. I would be lying if I said I didn't struggle with my own body image and have to remind myself daily that it's okay to not fit their mold. I won't lie to you. We live in a world that feels the need to comment on every inch of our skin rather than focus on more important issues. Shut off the noise and ignore the words that are given in hate. You have better things to do than focus on their negativity.

Make your own mold.

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