Dwight K. Schrute Narrates Your College Lecture Thoughts
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Education

Dwight K. Schrute Narrates Your Thoughts Sitting Through An ENTIRE College Lecture

"You couldn't handle my undivided attention" — me to my professors.

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Dwight Schrute

Lectures are an inevitable part of college. They're long and often boring, but they do provide us with a valuable education. With a little help from "The Office's" resident beet farmer, I've created the progression of a college lecture as told by Dwight Schrute.

1. Walking into the classroom.

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WIll I ever get out of here? Probably not.

2. ... or TRYING to walk into the classroom.

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Who thought 300 person classes were a good idea?

3. Spotting the perfect seat...

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You know what I'm talking about. Back corner, next to a socket, with an empty seat next to it for your backpack.

4. ...and then watching that seat get snagged by someone else.

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Now I'll have to sit in the second row while the professor makes eye contact. A lot of eye contact.

5. The professor starts lecturing.

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Wait, what are you talking about?

6. And then when they look at you while they're lecturing.

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"Yes, yes, very interesting! Of course, I'm writing this down!"

7/ But apparently that wasn't enough so they stop to ask for everyone's attention.

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The people asleep in the back row may not be listening, but I am. Promise.

8. Inevitably, the one person with bronchitis happens to be in this class, hacking up a lung.

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Go to the student health center already!

9. Then, the professor will tell a lame joke related to the material.

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Will laughing give me extra credit? Probably not, but it's worth a try.

10. The professor asks a question, and starts looking around for someone to call on.

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Sorry, can't answer, writing down everything you say.

11. The professor assigns a complicated assignment, then tries to make it sound simple.

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Who knew you could do a 26-part project in just three days?

12. When someone reminds the professor to pick up the assignment from the previous class

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Why are you the way that you are?

13. Then, class ends. But the professor is still lecturing?!

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You can't keep me here!

14. When the professor FINALLY lets you leave

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Sweet, sweet freedom.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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