Before we get started, let me just say I am very happy with my boyfriend, but damn do we live in a messed up world. People in college are constantly second guessing themselves trying to answer one question... "Are we really dating?" There is so much gray area that shouldn't even be there in the first place when it comes to dating in college. Late-Night Mate, Not Exclusive, "Seeing Someone," Exclusive or FBO (Facebook Official). Why can't we just make this more black and white people? No wonder hardly anyone dates in college. It's confusing as all hell. We barely know what we want to make for dinner much less who we wanna go home with every night.
"Late Night Mate"
This a nice way of saying "fuck buddy." Chances are if the only time you hear from this person is past midnight, you fall under this category. The texts usually go somewhere along the lines of "What are you up to?" or the more blunt version "Come over." I'm gonna let you know right now that this is probably not gonna turn into anything good. If they don't care to introduce you to their friends or hangout with you while the sun is still out, they're not worth it. Unless you have absolutely no interest in being with this person, you should just get out while you're ahead.
"Not Exclusive"
This is essentially a hall pass to do whatever you want with whoever you want to. While this certainly frowned upon, do what makes you comfortable. Although let's be honest,one of you are bound to catch feelings at some point in time. There is nothing wrong with this, seeing as though we are human beings with emotions. However, if someone expresses their feelings to you and you don't feel the same way then GET OFF THE RIDE. Don't string people along and waste their time. You just end up looking like a jerk. Also that being said, don't get angry if someone is honest with you and you don't what they have to say. Not everyone is meant to be together so don't get hung up if things just don't work out. This is casual dating not life or death people.
"Seeing Someone"
AKA "I really like you but I wanna keep my options open in case someone better comes along" or "I just like being single." If you are not ready for a relationship there is nothing wrong with that but don't let someone wonderful go by just because you're afraid to take the next step. The way I see it, if you could see yourself bringing this person home to meet your family, you should probably take the chance of dating them. This isn't a marriage proposal, nor are you selling away your soul, it is a committed relationship simple as that. Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean you instantly become "boring" or use annoying baby talk (please just don't). Relationships are what you make of them. Never try to be someone you're not because you'll end up feeling resentful.
"Exclusive"
So you both agree that you are seeing each other and no one else. Obviously you must have some feelings for that person and would hate to see them with anyone else. So... why not make it official? I know we college kids (myself included at one point) are always saying how we are afraid of commitment or being tied down, but is that really what you're afraid of? All bullshit aside, if you really care about someone, why wouldn't you want them all to yourself? Makes sense doesn't it? Don't be afraid of commitments, life is full of them. You wouldn't tell your boss that you don't wanna commit to your work would you? Of course not, because let me tell you your boss would give that job to someone that wants to put that effort in. So give people a chance, have an open mind about relationships. If you decide to let this person go and they end up in another relationship, try your hardest not to be bitter. Don't send them the"oh you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?" text or something along those lines because it just comes off as rude. You bet your ass someone wants to be with them they're a great person, too bad you missed your opportunity. In other words, no one likes a cry baby. Catch my drift?
"FBO" (Facebook Official)
THE MOMENT WE HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR.....You're dating woo! Let's be honest if you really need social media to justify you're relationship you have other issues. However, this is a great way to show everyone that you are officially together and that you're proud to show them off. Give yourselves a pat on the back because let's be honest most people our age don't get to this point.
My final bit of advice: Don't be afraid to open up to someone and allow yourself to care for them. I know it can be scary, but damn is it worth it.
