Dating In College

Dating In College

The sad truth about the college dating scene.

Before we get started, let me just say I am very happy with my boyfriend, but damn do we live in a messed up world. People in college are constantly second guessing themselves trying to answer one question... "Are we really dating?" There is so much gray area that shouldn't even be there in the first place when it comes to dating in college. Late-Night Mate, Not Exclusive, "Seeing Someone," Exclusive or FBO (Facebook Official). Why can't we just make this more black and white people? No wonder hardly anyone dates in college. It's confusing as all hell. We barely know what we want to make for dinner much less who we wanna go home with every night.

"Late Night Mate"

This a nice way of saying "fuck buddy." Chances are if the only time you hear from this person is past midnight, you fall under this category. The texts usually go somewhere along the lines of "What are you up to?" or the more blunt version "Come over." I'm gonna let you know right now that this is probably not gonna turn into anything good. If they don't care to introduce you to their friends or hangout with you while the sun is still out, they're not worth it. Unless you have absolutely no interest in being with this person, you should just get out while you're ahead.

"Not Exclusive"

This is essentially a hall pass to do whatever you want with whoever you want to. While this certainly frowned upon, do what makes you comfortable. Although let's be honest,one of you are bound to catch feelings at some point in time. There is nothing wrong with this, seeing as though we are human beings with emotions. However, if someone expresses their feelings to you and you don't feel the same way then GET OFF THE RIDE. Don't string people along and waste their time. You just end up looking like a jerk. Also that being said, don't get angry if someone is honest with you and you don't what they have to say. Not everyone is meant to be together so don't get hung up if things just don't work out. This is casual dating not life or death people.

"Seeing Someone"

AKA "I really like you but I wanna keep my options open in case someone better comes along" or "I just like being single." If you are not ready for a relationship there is nothing wrong with that but don't let someone wonderful go by just because you're afraid to take the next step. The way I see it, if you could see yourself bringing this person home to meet your family, you should probably take the chance of dating them. This isn't a marriage proposal, nor are you selling away your soul, it is a committed relationship simple as that. Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean you instantly become "boring" or use annoying baby talk (please just don't). Relationships are what you make of them. Never try to be someone you're not because you'll end up feeling resentful.


So you both agree that you are seeing each other and no one else. Obviously you must have some feelings for that person and would hate to see them with anyone else. So... why not make it official? I know we college kids (myself included at one point) are always saying how we are afraid of commitment or being tied down, but is that really what you're afraid of? All bullshit aside, if you really care about someone, why wouldn't you want them all to yourself? Makes sense doesn't it? Don't be afraid of commitments, life is full of them. You wouldn't tell your boss that you don't wanna commit to your work would you? Of course not, because let me tell you your boss would give that job to someone that wants to put that effort in. So give people a chance, have an open mind about relationships. If you decide to let this person go and they end up in another relationship, try your hardest not to be bitter. Don't send them the"oh you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?" text or something along those lines because it just comes off as rude. You bet your ass someone wants to be with them they're a great person, too bad you missed your opportunity. In other words, no one likes a cry baby. Catch my drift?

"FBO" (Facebook Official)

THE MOMENT WE HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR.....You're dating woo! Let's be honest if you really need social media to justify you're relationship you have other issues. However, this is a great way to show everyone that you are officially together and that you're proud to show them off. Give yourselves a pat on the back because let's be honest most people our age don't get to this point.

My final bit of advice: Don't be afraid to open up to someone and allow yourself to care for them. I know it can be scary, but damn is it worth it.

Cover Image Credit: Relationships and College

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Saying Goodbye To Freshman Year

"High School goes by fast, but college goes by even faster."

“High School goes by fast, but college goes by even faster”, we’ve all heard it and probably all ignored it as well. I mean time is time. It moves at the same pace no matter what you’re doing right?


High School is over, I’m now a freshman in college and it’s April. I’m sitting here in my dorm looking at all my clothes, and bins thinking, how in the hell will this all fit in my car again? It is crazy, I need to be thinking about all of this now because there is one month of my freshman year left, just one.

All I can keep thinking is how? Wasn’t it just last week that I moved into my cozy room at the end of the hall, or just yesterday that I ran home to two hundred beautiful new sisters? As much as it seems like yesterday, it wasn’t.

It was almost eight months ago that I stepped onto this campus as a freshman, now it is my last four weeks and they are jam-packed. From formal to finals I am in the home stretch of my first year of college. I just registered for my classes next semester, and can’t get it through my head that I will soon be a sophomore.

While walking around campus I still catch myself thinking, wow I am really here. I am a college student, at a school, I fall more in love with every day. So, how can I be a sophomore now when I feel like I just got here?

Yes, I still have three amazing years of college ahead of me, and I can’t wait to see what those years have in store in for me. But, I just can’t help but feel a little sad that I won’t be a freshman anymore. I won’t be the youngest in my sorority family, I won’t be coming back to a dorm every night.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am stoked to live in an apartment next year with my absolute best friends. And you definitely could have heard me saying “I am so over this whole dorm thing” once or twice this semester, but now I can’t help but see all the things I’ll miss.

Freshman year is just unique. You get this giant clean slate, a fresh start. And it is just waiting to see what you’ll do with it. It truly is a year of firsts. My first failure, the first time being on my own, my first time not knowing anyone in my classes. Yes, that can all be a lot to take on, I was terrified at the start of the school year. But before I knew it, I had a routine, I had friends, I had a life here.

And this life surpassed all my expectations. I have a home away from home. I have friends that I know will be my bridesmaids some day. I have experiences that I’ll never forget.

Now as I head back home for the summer I couldn’t be more excited to be with my friends there and my family. But, I also couldn’t be sadder to leave my friends here, even if it’s only for three months because they’ve become another kind of family.

Despite leaving freshman year behind, we have so many more memories to make whether it’s doing the Seminole chop in Doak, coordinating our Halloween costumes, or just chilling at the house. We’ve all come so far this year, and I can’t wait to see just how far we go. So bring it on Sophomore year, I’m ready for ya.

Cover Image Credit: Cameron Kira

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Your Feelings Are Not Invalid, It's OK To Not Be OK

I know that life can get really hard, but I promise it'll be okay.


Recently, I have had an extremely hard time with my level of happiness that I have in my life. I go through my days feeling overly exhausted by the drama and hardship around me. I have gone through the past few weeks really struggling with this stint of depression and anxiety that I have been fighting with through the course of my life. These past few weeks, I have had large issues with this feeling of not being good enough and feeling like the world around me is falling apart because of stress and drama and self-image issues happening around me. I was at a point where I found myself not being able to have a positive thought in my mind and it was feeling like the whole world was against me.

I hate feeling like this. I feel like my world is crashing down and I truly just want to feel better. I have come to the conclusion in my life that the world I find myself living in makes us feel like if you feel depressed or upset, you have an issue and you are not alright. Numerous times I have been told that I need to get over it or that my issues are just "first world issues" that do not matter. This has shown me that there is communication in our world that is not being discussed. Depression has become this thing that society looks at so commonly and we have become accustomed to the idea of people around us being depressed that it makes us numb to it. This has made people think of depression as something not as horrible as it truly is because "everyone" has it. Depression is something that is extremely detrimental to the person being affected by it.

My journey with depression and anxiety started at a young age. I would have anxiety attacks at random times because of untold issues that I was having with my father or issues with bullying. From that young age, I learned very quickly to put up an act when I was around people because I didn't want them to tell me that I needed to get over it or tell me that it was not an actual issue and I was just being dramatic. I kept my mouth shut and pretended that this black mass wasn't engulfing me into is and pulling me deeper and deeper into this whole that was full of self-deprecating thoughts and images. People in school with me and that went dancing with me couldn't tell at all. They thought that I was this nice, happy little girl and honestly, I couldn't be mean to anyone else because all of my efforts were being put into being mean to myself. But, as I said, I couldn't express this to anyone because I felt like this issue I was having was one that I shouldn't be having and that there was something wrong with me for feeling this way.

Here's the thing: it has taken me so long to realize it, but I have come to understand that it is okay not to be okay.

Going through my life with this overall and underlying sadness and self-image trouble does prevent me from doing some things, but it does not mean that I need to stop doing what I am. I do have this issue but it is alright for me to talk about it and there is nothing wrong with me for feeling the way I do because at this point in my life and in history, there are a lot of things I have to deal with that are not the greatest mentally. Understanding the issue and talking about it is the only way to improve my metal standing, however, and I feel like this right to talk about it should not feel like it is too taboo to actually have conversations about. The world around us though needs to listen and stop blowing off these issues like they are not important. I have experienced many times this idea of someone telling me that I complain too much after I talk to them about the struggles I have in my life and I am sick and tired of feeling as though my problems do not matter. Big or small, people react to hardships differently and this needs to be something that the world understands and listens to.

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