I have always dealt with being a people-pleaser. I hated feeling like I was disappointing those around me, so I would do whatever it took to the keep those around me happy, even if it meant sacrificing my own happiness. Even now I struggle with saying "no." If someone asks something of me, I always feel a little guilty with refusing to do whatever it is they want. It's always been a constant struggle between choosing to please the next person and doing what I really want.
But the older I get, the more I realize how easy it can be to simply say "no." Because the moment you allow yourself to alter a piece of your own life in order to make someone else happy, you are sacrificing your own happiness. But I'm here to tell you that It's okay to be selfish when it comes to your own happiness, and it's okay to do what YOU want to do. It can be so easy to go with the flow. But you weren't made to go with the flow. You were put in this life to do what you want with it, even if it means going against the current.
I know there can be exceptions to this rule, such as a relationship or work environment. If we continued doing whatever we wanted and acting however we pleased in these situations, we would end up jobless and single. Sacrifices must take place in order to maintain a healthy relationship and successful career. No, I'm talking about going against what you want in order to make your family and friends happy. Rather that be staying at a job you hate or staying in a relationship that makes you miserable, enough is enough. This is YOUR life, and it's the only one you have.
Even if choosing your own happiness means making some people mad and losing friendships, those who really love you will stay and support you no matter what you choose. Those are the people who really matter. So do what makes YOU happy, even if that means stepping on some toes along the way.
I'm a firm believer that there is no such thing as time wasted. We live and we learn, and every chapter in life comes with a lesson. However, the moment you realize that the chapter you are currently in no longer brings you the happiness you desire, it is your responsibility to move on from that and create a new chapter in your life. It is your responsibility to be selfish and choose to be happy.
From this moment on, I choose my own happiness. I choose to stop pleasing others and start pleasing myself. I choose to be selfish.
