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46 Jokes To Read When You Just Need A Little Giggle

Nothing like a cheesy joke to pick you up when you're feelin' down!

Hrybnick

Oct 15, 2018

Ithaca College

174

46 Jokes To Read When You Just Need A Little Giggle

Photo from Tumblr page "raccoon-in-saturn"

1. What do you call a fake noodle?

An imPASTA!!!!!

2. What is a monsters favorite type of sandwich?

An I-SCREAM sandwich!

3. Why wouldn't the shrimp share his treasure?

Because he was a little SHELL-fish.

4. Why is Peter Pan always flying?

He never lands!

5. Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?

The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "Ketchup"!

6. What do you call the security guards outside of the Samsung store?

The Guardians of the Galaxy.

7. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?

Because he felt crummy.

8. What did the tree say to the wind?

Leaf me alone!

9. Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?

Because it's pointless

10. What do you call a cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese!

11. How do you make a tissue dance?

You put a little boogie into it!

12. What do you call a bear with no ears?

13. Why couldn't the pony sing at the talent show?

Because he was a little hoarse

14. What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the court room?

Odor in the court!

15. Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze.

16. Why aren't koalas actual bears?

because they don't meet the koalafications

17. What does a nosey pepper do??

It gets jalapeño business

18. As a scarecrow, people tell me I'm outstanding in my field.

But hay, it's in my jeans!

19. How did the hipster burn his mouth?

He ate the pizza before it was cool

20. I bought the worlds worse thesaurus yesterday.

Not only was it terrible, but it was terrible

21. Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

Because the P is silent

22. What do you call an alligator in a vest?

An investiGATOR

23. What would happen if you ate yeast and shoe polish??

Every morning you would rise and shine

24. What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?

You can't tuna fish

25. Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

because she will Let It Go!

26. What do you get from a pampered cow?

Spoiled milk

27. What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?

An irrelephant

28. What do lawyers wear to work?

Lawsuits

29. where do crayons go on vacation?

Color-ado

30. What do you call a computer floating in the ocean?

A Dell rolling in the deep

31. Did you hear about the hungry clock?

It went back four seconds

32. What is a called when a cat wins a dog show?

A cat-has-trophy

33. What is heavy forwards, but not backwards?

A ton

34. What did the femur say to the patella?

I kneed you

35. What do you call a laughing jar of mayonnaise?

LMAYO

36. What do you call a sad coffee??

A despresso

37. Why are frogs always so happy?

Because they eat whatever bugs them

38. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

39. What is the bet day to go to the beach?

Sunday, of course!

40. What do you call a laughing motorcycle?

A Yamahahahaha

41. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

because he had no-body to go with :(

42. What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

43. Did you hear the joke about the roof??

Never mind, it's over your head.

44. I've been hiding from exercise...

I'm in the fitness protection program

45. Did you hear about the angry pancake?

He just flipped!

46. Why did the traffic light turn red?

You would to if you had to change in the middle of the street.....

I was cackling while reading these, so I hope you smiled even just a little. Enjoy the rest of your day!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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46 Jokes To Read When You Just Need A Little Giggle

Nothing like a cheesy joke to pick you up when you're feelin' down!

1. What do you call a fake noodle?

2. What is a monsters favorite type of sandwich?

3. Why wouldn't the shrimp share his treasure?

4. Why is Peter Pan always flying?

5. Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?

6. What do you call the security guards outside of the Samsung store?

7. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?

8. What did the tree say to the wind?

9. Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?

10. What do you call a cheese that isn't yours?

11. How do you make a tissue dance?

12. What do you call a bear with no ears?

13. Why couldn't the pony sing at the talent show?

14. What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the court room?

15. Why do fish live in salt water?

16. Why aren't koalas actual bears?

17. What does a nosey pepper do??

18. As a scarecrow, people tell me I'm outstanding in my field.

19. How did the hipster burn his mouth?

20. I bought the worlds worse thesaurus yesterday.

21. Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

22. What do you call an alligator in a vest?

23. What would happen if you ate yeast and shoe polish??

24. What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?

25. Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

26. What do you get from a pampered cow?

27. What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?

28. What do lawyers wear to work?

29. where do crayons go on vacation?

30. What do you call a computer floating in the ocean?

31. Did you hear about the hungry clock?

32. What is a called when a cat wins a dog show?

33. What is heavy forwards, but not backwards?

34. What did the femur say to the patella?

35. What do you call a laughing jar of mayonnaise?

36. What do you call a sad coffee??

37. Why are frogs always so happy?

38. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

39. What is the bet day to go to the beach?

40. What do you call a laughing motorcycle?

41. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

42. What do you call a bear with no teeth?

43. Did you hear the joke about the roof??

44. I've been hiding from exercise...

45. Did you hear about the angry pancake?

46. Why did the traffic light turn red?

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There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

1. What do you do for a living?

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