Catcalling is not a compliment, so please do not catcall me.
I do not like to be whistled at from a car window because we whistle at dogs, not at human beings. Whistling at a woman is demeaning—I am not here to take your whistle commands like a dog. I am a human being. I am equal to you and the guy sitting in the driver’s seat next to you, as you hang your upper body out of the car window and begin to yell at me.
Please do not yell things like, “Nice a**!” at me while I’m walking through campus to a meeting at 9pm. I do not view those types of interactions as compliments.
Please do not throw things at me while I am running.
I do not deserve for you to yell out your car window at me, and then proceed for you to throw an empty Gatorade bottle out of that window in an attempt to hit me. I am not something to throw your garbage at. Is it too much to ask to be able to exercise in peace? Is it too hard to let a woman live her life without whistling, whooping, yelling at or harassing her, or just making her uncomfortable in general?
Recently I took a trip to Panera to get myself a bagel (because who doesn’t love a nice bagel in the morning?) before I went to observe in a classroom. I was dressed nicely, as I should’ve been since I was going to field experience. As I got out of my car, I noticed a man walking out of Panera, and he was also walking by my car. I stood up from the driver’s seat and this man slowed his pace as he passed by my car, staring at me the whole time. I just stared straight ahead, feeling this roughly 60-year-old man’s eyes stuck on me. Paying as little attention as I could—although I felt very uncomfortable—I walked toward the door.
I assumed this man would’ve just turned back around and walked toward his car, but when I looked up, I could see his reflection in the restaurant window. He had completely turned around in the parking lot, was stopped to a standstill, and watched me walk the entire way into the restaurant.
Now, before someone gives me the whole, “Well you must’ve been wearing something provocative” speech, I will stop you right there. I was wearing knee-high boots, black tights, a flowy black dress—not skin tight at all—with a large scarf around my neck, completely covering my chest.
I do not consider myself to be someone who accuses all men of being pigs and creeps, because I truly know there are wonderful (not creepy at all) men out there. However, I do not think that a (roughly) 60-year-old man gawking at a 20-year old girl is something that should be acceptable. Throwing trash at a woman who is running down the street is not okay, and screaming “nice ass!” to a girl as she’s walking is just demeaning and rude—it’s not a compliment.
As a whole, we need to stop dismissing boys’ behaviors as, “boys will be boys” and simply let it slide. Boys and men should be taught to respect every woman that they come across.
