I have just finished my fourth week of college classes, and to say this week has been hard for me would be an understatement. The first few weeks of college were pretty good and easy for me. I felt as if I was adjusting great, and I wasn't really feeling homesick since I see someone from my family every weekend. This last week, I just felt completely done. I was done with being away from my family, and I was done being alone and on my own.
Now, I say this so you know that breaking down in college is normal. In my case, it was caused by my anxiety, stress, and good old mother nature (and all the girls groan). It was mainly just Tuesday and Wednesday, but I honestly felt like it set the tone for the entire week. I can't even tell you what exactly happened because much of it is a blur. What I do know is that I cried more in those two days than I have in the last six months (that's a lot of crying). I would be just walking to and from class, and I would feel the strong urge to just breakdown there. I had to hold my breath almost the entire walk back to my dorm in order to not have a full-blown panic attack in front of everyone around me. Those two days, I called my grandmother, for I knew my mom was at work, to have someone to talk to and walk me through it. My mom is usually my go-to when I'm feeling super anxious because she always knows just what to say for me to calm down. Being 150 miles away from her hit me like a truck in those moments. When I was busy with classes, homework, or other activities, it was easy to not focus on how I truly am away from my family and on my own.
With the combination of stress from my classes and being so far away from my mom, I just had a meltdown and didn't know how to assess my feelings. By calling my grandma and talking things out, I ended up going to her house later Wednesday evening after my classes were finished. It's easier for me to visit her than go home because she only lives 30 minutes from campus. Simply by removing myself from my dorm and campus, I was able to finish a paper for one of my classes (where all my stress was coming from).
Removing yourself from the environment that is giving you stress and anxiety, even if it's only for a little bit, can shift your whole mood. While I was only away for a couple of hours, the rest of my week went without me feeling like crying at random times for no reason during the day. Many of my friends have experienced the same feelings in the last week or two, also. College is a new experience for everyone, so don't feel like you are all alone when you are feeling down.
